Wild Rumpusing

When Worlds Collide

2012-01-27T23:55:00.001-08:00

I went to a conference today and it was a touch overwhelming - there were people from all aspects of my interpreting/professional life. I saw my former boss who is really responsible for much of the foundation of my practice and accomplishments as an interpreter - she always believed in me and challenged me. I saw colleagues from my early, early days as an interpreter in K-12 settings and it was SO good to see them. I saw students from almost every year that I taught in the Interpreter Training Program. I saw interpreters I used to coordinate at the University where I worked. I saw folks who used to work for the same company I work for now, current employees, people from other states...Just everyone. Long forgotten names and faces. And generosity.

Today was a good day.

Officially Behind

2012-01-26T23:53:00.000-08:00

I've just accepted that I am behind on EVERYTHING. This week has been early mornings and late nights and the whole weekend is going to be that, as well.

I hope that I can catch up on Sunday. The work that is waiting for me is BIG stuff. Important. But sleep is necessary.

I'm So Lucky

2012-01-25T23:52:00.000-08:00

I got me some good peeps. That is all.

Real Life, No Frills

2012-01-24T23:18:00.000-08:00

I'm am regularly reminded (at least this year) that there is much real life happening when I am looking the other way. Obviously, we all have the work we do for financial stability, but there is also the work we are meant to do in the world. I am struggling on the boundary between the two.

Sometimes, sometimes, the work I do in the day-to-day seems ridiculous when I see the work I am meant to do in the world. Today was one of those days - but that sense of detachment wasn't a bad thing. It allowed me to take things less personally, to worry a little less about perfection. (I said "a little less"!)

I have a friend who is quite ill and it just serves to remind me that our time here is short and that every minute I spend worrying about doing something perfectly or trying to make everyone happy (knowing that is impossible) is a minute I could be spending making sure that those I love know how I feel about them.

"Live life. This is not a dress rehearsal." I used to have a bumper sticker that said something like that quote. I just need to pay attention more often.

Some New Art Journal Fodder

2012-01-23T23:59:00.000-08:00

I was reminded that today is the beginning of Chinese New Year - Year of the Dragon. May this year bring you much joy and laughter.

Year of Abundance by January 22!

2012-01-22T23:59:00.000-08:00

I am taking so many classes and doing so many different events - my cup runneth over this year and it is only January. Now comes the hard part - saying no to some things that I *really* want to do, but know I can't work out. That is always a good lesson for me - I'm not good with the NO.

I knew 2012 was going to be a change - the air, the light, the weight of things. I'm still feeling it and still feeling good. That has been a long time coming. I'm so excited for all that is coming my way.

Avoiding the Fire

2012-01-21T23:59:00.000-08:00

I'm struggling with some of the exercises in both the ecourses I am taking: How To Build a Blog You Truly Love and A Year With Myself. I know why I'm struggling - it is delving into the depths of who we are and what we want and where we go from here. There is a part of me that is seeking this process, these kinds of exercises and the truths of my life and at the same time, I have a fear of it.

It is probably natural to avoid holding a mirror up to oneself or shining a light on some of the things that make us who we are but may not make us feel proud or strong. I'm hoping that with these practices, it will become easier. I felt like I had to acknowledge my resistance so that maybe I could get through it.

I have been visiting some of the other blogs in the courses and they have so much to share. I hope that I will be able to reach those levels of sharing and authenticity. I'm reaching but I don't always make it.

How Does This Happen?

2012-01-20T23:59:00.000-08:00

One of the reasons I don't like to take a bunch of time off around the holidays (I like some, just not too much) is that I end up coming back not only to the pile of work that generates while I'm gone just by virtue of not having anyone else to do it. There is also the start of all this new stuff and visits and running around.

I find the catching up and the starting off takes away most of the beneficial effects of the time off. I'm trying to work through it with as much grace and calm as I can, but I feel like I'm treading water just a bit and that frustrates me more. I know there is a lesson here and if I can step back for few minutes, I will be able to see it. I'm not there yet.

SOPA and PIPA

2012-01-19T23:59:00.000-08:00

I heard an interesting interview about SOPA and PIPA tonight on the radio when I was driving home...and now I'm feeling a little confused about the whole thing. I think I need to do some reading.

The radio show was "The Norman Goldman Show" and he was interviewing a writer (I can't remember his name) about his views about SOPA and PIPA in light of the internet site closures yesterday and the rising/turning tide of the SOPA/PIPA bills. Basically, his point is that there is just as much corporate interest behind the Internet as there is on the movie studio side. Some of the most powerful interests in the country are involved in this fight and ultimately, no matter what happens, consumers are likely to be negatively impacted.

I need to do more research on all of this - I'm not really sure what it all means to us all. I know I don't normally post political stuff on this blog, but I feel like this is such a huge issue and it is more complicated than we think it is.

Not Rumpusing this week

2012-01-18T23:59:00.000-08:00

I was doing so well, keeping up with all the classes and reading, but I am also hosting an out of town visitor at work and with the weather issues, I just got behind today. I felt like it was all okay if I was reading it all, but I didn't even read anything today - no time. So, this weekend is going to be a weekend of catching up on my classes and some of the exercises.

I'm definitely over-thinking some of the exercises. I keep thinking that maybe I will really let go if I think things through, but today, I remembered that that is the OPPOSITE of letting go. I need to stop thinking about my answers and start answering. Stop thinking about what I want to accomplish and start doing it. Sometimes, I just need a little kick in the butt.

Snow...

2012-01-17T23:59:00.000-08:00

I wish I could just enjoy the snow, but I can't. As an adult and as a person in charge of an office, it wreaks havoc on everything. I hate driving in it. Hopefully, it will change to rain in the morning. I didn't even take any pictures of it...

Love and Hate - Martin Luther King, Jr.

2012-01-16T23:42:00.000-08:00

photo: Roee Ruttenberg

"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that." - Martin Luther King, Junior (1963)

Procrastination, Thy Name is Jean

2012-01-16T23:34:00.000-08:00

I really had plans to do a lot more and I ended up doing absolutely nothing useful. I didn’t work on my classes (although I DID read the new material that was released for them and watched a video for my February Lettering class), my journal, my blog, nothing. I checked Facebook, I played games, I watched some bad television, got annoyed by the news and the panic over “possible snow”.

Speaking of snow, I have a bone to pick with the news media. Granted, we live in a very difficult area of the country to forecast, but they are WRONG 99% percent of the time and yet, a few days ago, they had the nerve to do a mocking story about how everyone here panics when it might snow. I remember the first panic that happened. I think it was probably 1996. The media actually encouraged businesses to send people home early (like about 2pm) because we were heading for a “blizzard”. Since it was the first time anyone had heard that kind of report in this area, people took it seriously and schools and businesses closed and sent everyone home. All at the same time. If rush hour is from 3:30-7pm and everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) rushes out and gets on the road, guess what happens? It takes 8 hours to get 17.5 miles. Seriously. Fast-forward to today when they are almost disappointed that there isn’t any trouble on the roads. GRR. It is quite irritating.

So, anyway, I didn’t do anything useful and I’m a little sad about it, but I’m just going to put it down to having a true day off.

I need to sit down and do a little timeline/map. I have a book to read, a show to rehearse and classes to keep up with in addition to all the regular life stuff. I'm exhilarated, but I am also feeling some resistance as some of the course work requires some self-reflection that goes a bit deeper than "what color do you want your blog to be?". I knew this going into it, so I'm not completely surprised by my reaction, but I am also committed to doing the work. That's the sad thing about paying for stuff - when I pay for it, I'm more likely to participate. You'd think I could just do all this and make it happen on my own, but there is an accountability that happens when you actually spend money and commit to a community of other people. I'm stoked and a little nervous. Maybe it is just me (I doubt it), but it is always scary to look deep because I'm either afraid of what I will find or WON'T find and/or afraid to change.

Wish me luck!

SoulBook Cover

2012-01-15T23:59:00.000-08:00

I spent the last couple of days working in my Soul Book. I took a class from the Brave Girls Club and I'm finally able to work on some of the art parts. This is a little different than my art journals, but it uses some of the same techniques if I want to do it that way. I'm still figuring out some of what I want to do, but I'm happy with it so far.

I thought about not posting the front cover just because it might seem egotistical - that isn't the point at all... this isn't an art journal - it is a book to look to on difficult days or days when I need to remember who I am and what I believe and where I'm going. I like the idea and I took a little bit of a different path than what the instructors said. You will have to take the class to find out more. :)

Here are pics of the cover, front and back:

Back Cover - I did this first. I don't know why I liked the perfume bottle and poof, other than the pink color. Somehow, it works for me.

The instructors recommended having pictures of ourselves. I decided to put them on the front - me and the people/places times that I love.

My New Love Affair

2012-01-14T12:12:00.000-08:00

I was on Pinterest and I found a hair tutorial that I wanted to try. I went to the website of the person and went looking for some other tutorials (I haven't mastered ANY of the hair tutorials). I found this AMAZING PURSE. It is the PERFECT COLOR. The first photo doesn't really show the color quite right, but it is a nice picture of the bag and the lovely skirt the author is wearing. Ironically, I saw her on the People's Choice Awards the other night giving a makeover to an unknown woman. What a strange circular set of events. Anyway, I purchased the purse knowing that if it wasn't the same color as the second picture below, I would be returning it.

I found this purse on Keiko Lynn's website (found from a hair tutorial on Pinterest)...

The bag is ACTUALLY THIS COLOR!! It is the purse I have been waiting for since I was 5 or 6 years old. I am IN LOVE!! And it arrived on Thursday. It is EXACTLY THIS COLOR!! I'm swooning a little bit.

**Both of these photos are from www.keikolynn.com

What I'm Working on...

2012-01-13T23:59:00.000-08:00

Change is Hard, Not Impossible

2012-01-12T23:59:00.000-08:00

A lot of people get impatient with the pace of change. - James Levine

I always have these imaginings that when I decide to do something or change something, it happens quickly and smoothly. I'm usually (almost always) wrong. This time is no exception, but I'm not feeling down about it. Just trying to figure it out.

I think that is a sign of maturity (I hope). Usually, if I lose patience or get frustrated, I use it as an excuse to give up or change my mind (read: back away in fear). This time, as I realize that I have things to do for myself and things that I have committed to others, instead of letting others trump self, I'm figuring out what I need to do for both.

I want/imainge myself to be a person who isn't governed by structure and rules. I had a boss who said, "You should work on the handbook because you are a black and white person." I was really offended and kind of hurt, but later I realized that there is truth to that. I see the shades of gray, but only because I know where the black and white are. I do believe in rules although I'm not adverse to bending or breaking them for the right reasons. I guess I thought that if I need structure and rules and boundaries it meant that I wasn't fun or funny or friendly or flexible. My head believes that none of those things are true. My heart still doesn't buy that it is okay to have both. (I think this is a little bit of Roby legacy.)

I don't really like surprises anymore - I've had enough unpleasant ones to last me a lifetime, so I guess it makes sense that I like to have some predictability in my life. I think that some level of predictability is underrated. If you have a base of predictable behavior, predictable outcomes, it is easier to roll with the punches that you CAN'T control. Does that make sense?

Anyway, I have a lot going on with all the classes and work and the blog and art journaling and my book group and a play I'm working on, and and and... But I'm feeling good. I'm a little behind everywhere, but I haven't given up. I'm structuring in time to work on each thing and will continue to do that as I move forward.

I can't wait to see where this leads!

Meaning and Purpose

2012-01-11T23:57:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited about all that is happening right now.

I started my "How to Build a Blog You Truly Love" course today - I'm about 3 days behind, but I read all the lessons and I'm ready to work. I'm really excited to dive into my own ideas and goals and dreams about this blog. I can't describe why blogging has become such an important thing to me - it just is. I get a great sense of accomplishment and satisfaction just knowing that I've committed myself to documenting. I'm still working on finding the path(s) I want to take, but I get closer and closer all the time.

I also signed up for a course called "A Year With Myself". I just feel like I'm doing some mental, emotional and physical stretching - new things, deeper into some of the same things. I'm excited and nervous to explore and grow and set some goals for myself and my life and my blog.

2012 is gonna be a big year, I can tell.

Home Again

2012-01-10T23:59:00.000-08:00

Well, I definitely had a whirlwind trip up to Seattle. I can honestly say that I don't like driving on a freeway with 5 - 7 lanes and exits on the right AND left. It was kind of stressful getting there in the rain, but I did get there easily and WITHOUT GPS!! :) I proudly refuse to use GPS. I like knowing where to turn before a voice tells me to "Turn Now".

Saw some good people and got to work with some folks I don't usually get to see (obviously). Dinner out with a colleague and then the long drive home.

Anyway, since I have to work tomorrow, I'm off to bed.

On The Road Again

2012-01-09T23:59:00.000-08:00

I had a nice dinner with Roby's mom and step-dad last night - our annual outing to remember Roby and see each other. I am going to be better about calling at other times during the year this year - we all suffer from the "I don't want to bother you if you are busy" syndrome, so then we don't see each other. I love them dearly, so I want to be sure I spend time with then as regularly as I can.

Tonight, I am in Seattle. I had to work on payroll from a hotel computer - I can't do it with this little netbook and no mouse...keys are too small, too much mouse-work for me. I will be working with a new co-worker. I should not drive to strange places in the dark - it was raining and the speed limit is 70 mph - not my forte in the dark in an unfamiliar place. I made it safe and sound, but my shoulders are tight from tensing. :) Tomorrow, I will be driving home in the same conditions, but it doesn't matter when I get home...Tonight I was feeling the pressure to get to the hotel.

So, even though I know that I have blog course material waiting for me, I have an early morning, so I'm off to bed. More tomorrow! I can't wait to start my class!!!

16 Years Without Roby

2012-01-08T13:20:00.000-08:00

Today, 16 years ago, Roby Starns died. I still miss him.

Roby Starns, 1985, Aloha High School Theatre Awards Night

I know that it is difficult for people sometimes to understand missing someone for so long. After all these years, it isn't the intense missing that I felt when he first died. It doesn't burn or stab or throb. I don't wallow in missing Roby - I just miss him. I wonder what he would think about things sometimes or if he would like this music or this show or movie. I think of him when I watch Kurt and his dad on "Glee" because I wish Roby's dad could have been like that.

All combined, Roby has been a part of my life for the last 29 years...only about 1/3 of my life happened before I knew him. I think this kind of warrants some attention. Missing is okay to me.

Roby at Hug Point, 1987

Most importantly, I think it is important to remember and honor him, our friendship, how he shaped me as a person (in good and bad ways), how our experience with HIV/AIDS and his death impacted me and taught me. I love him still and always will. It may not make sense to anyone else, but it makes sense to me. I believe I have it in perspective and I believe that I have carried on with life in many healthy ways. One of the ways I have been able to do that is to honor my dear, sweet, obstinant, funny friend each year on days that are important - his birthday and the anniversary of the day we lost a beautiful soul.

16 years ago, today, at 3:04 AM, I lost my best friend. Roby Starns, I miss you and remember you still.

Roby at Ecola State Park, 1989

Extending the Celebration!

2012-01-07T14:28:00.000-08:00

Since the Blogoversary is happening on the weekend and I didn't do a 37 Day countdown like I did last year, I thought I should extend the comments deadline. :)

If you leave a comment on the Blogoversary post by Wednesday, January 11 at 11:59 PM PST, I will enter you into a drawing for a copy of Gretchen Rubin's NY Times Best Seller, "The Happiness Project".

I hope this will help those who want to participate!

Four Years of WildRumpusing! Happy Blogoversary!

2012-01-07T09:26:00.000-08:00

Hi visitors!

Today is a very special day for me as it marks four years of blogging! I can't believe I have been able to keep at this for so long! Thank you to each and every person who visits!

Anyone who leaves a comment Wednesday, January 11, 2012 by 11:59 PM PST will be entered in a drawing to win a copy of "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin. She is a blogger I found early on in my travels in the blogosphere and her approach really resonated with me. Her book has been on the NY Times Best Seller's list for a while and her Page-A-Day Calendar has gone VIRAL this season because the online sellers ran out of copies. (Check back here tomorrow and I will announce a winner. I will need to have you contact me so that I can send the book.)

I hope that you continue to come visit WildRumpusing in the year to come. You will see new projects, new purpose, new stories. I can't wait to see what changes will come! I hope you will join me on the journey. Thank you for doing so now!

Happy 2012! May it be filled with wild rumpusing and WildRumpusing!

Lazy Day, Project Day

2012-01-06T23:39:00.000-08:00

I spent the day online - I checked my work email, facebook, watched videos from an art journaling course I'm taking, organized some photos, did some pinning on Pinterest. It was a good day. I also started working on my art journal from the course I watched. My biggest problem is waiting for the paint to dry all the way. I hate waiting.

It was a rare, lazy, guilt-free day of looking forward, planning for the next couple of months. I have more shows coming up so I have to clear spots to work on them, plus I have several online courses I signed up for coming up and 2 that I delayed starting until the show was done. I also need to start reading my book for the 37Days Book Group - I have it on my Kindle, but I wasn't ready to start it today. I will do it tomorrow.

Tomorrow I have plans to see some old friends for an evening of fun and games. Seems an odd juxtaposition in light of the anniversary I will observe on Sunday. Life is funny, sometimes. But I know Roby would be happy to know that I was still having fun with my friends and remembering him every step of the way.

Show Done, Moving On

2012-01-05T23:59:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm a little sad that I am just checking "West Side Story" off my list of things to do, but I am. I enjoyed the show and I feel like I did a good job. At the same time, it felt like a dangling piece of 2011 since I started working on it last year. I have all these projects and things I want to be doing for the start of the New Year and I am going to be able to start doing some of them.

I feel really good about where things are and how I feel about this year. I don't have unrealistic expectations, just some good plans to do some things for myself - things I have needed/wanted to do for a long time.

Blogoversary coming up on January 7. 4 years. 16 year anniversary of Roby's death on January 8. Dec. 28 was 5 years since my Dad died. Winter is a heavy time for me, sometimes. This year, I feel like I'm connecting with some of this in a new way and I'm happy about that.

I was smart enough to take the day off tomorrow, so I roll into a weekend with a day to myself. Nice.

Post 1365

2012-01-04T21:44:00.000-08:00

In 2 days, I will be celebrating my 4-year Blogoversary! Unbelievable! Even more unbelievable is that this is my 1, 365th post! Now, I'm not saying that all these posts are anything special on their own, but as a group, as a consistent project - 1365 is a lot of posts. I'm so proud of the blog for a lot of reasons. No matter what, I keep going. No matter how boring or how uninspired I feel sometimes, I keep coming back. I know that sometimes that isn't so thrilling for the folks who do come and read here, but hopefully, over the weekend, when my "How to Build A Blog You Truly Love" ecourse starts, you will reap the benefits of my learning. I'm so looking forward to it!

Thank you so much to anyone who visits here! I appreciate each person who comes by to read - if even for a moment or two. It is an awesome thing to throw my voice out into the wind to see if anyone is out there. I do it for myself and I appreciate the support I receive from my blog-reading friends.

I love to hear from folks who stop by. I hope you'll leave a comment or two. I hope you will come back by sometime to see how WildRumpusing grows as I take my ecourse.

Something's Coming

2012-01-03T23:39:00.000-08:00

I got to preview "West Side Story" tonight before we interpret on Thursday. The production is very good - good actors and dancers, the sound was good, everyone seemed to have good energy. I still prefer the movie version because that is what I saw first, but this was a very good production.

I think next year, I will try to pass on the show that comes right after Christmas - it is always a challenge to get it all in during the holidays. I suppose it will depend on the show because I'm pretty sure I said the same thing last year. When I saw it was "West Side Story" this year, I couldn't turn it down. I've done this show one other time but I was/am looking forward to doing it again.

Here is "Something's Coming" from the movie "West Side Story":

I'm Already Behind??

2012-01-02T23:59:00.000-08:00

I had a good time with my out-of-town visitor and now, I'm getting ready to go back to work tomorrow. I wish I had a few days off that were just for me, but I wasn't able to do that this time. There was shopping and Christmas and prepping for a visitor and being with a visitor. None of those things are bad, but I sort of need a vacation from my vacation. I will have another 4 day weekend this weekend, but it is full up, too. I have the show on Thursday, nothing on Friday, party on Saturday and Sunday, I hope to spend time with Roby's mom. It will be 16 years since his death and I like to remember him with his mother.

I do have "West Side Story" this Thursday, which I'm excited about. I love this show, although I haven't seen this production yet. We go to preview it tomorrow for our work.

I'm thinking about all the exciting stuff that I'm doing this year and I can't wait to get started. I feel like I'm already behind, but I'm not. I'm just ready to get started. I have downloaded the first 37Days Book Group book on my Kindle and I'm ready to read!

Welcome to 2012!

2012-01-01T23:59:00.000-08:00

I spent New Year's Eve with friends and family. It was less of a celebration and more of a fun time, which is okay because most New Year's celebrations don't end well. This was mostly calm, mostly drama-free. Just the way I like it.

I'm not really one for resolutions and I didn't find success last year with my "one word", but as I have been saying for a few weeks - I have plans. Some of the things I'm doing have been posted here on the blog - classes, reading, that kind of thing. Some of the things I'm doing are going to be at work (read: not posted here) and some things are personal and also, not going to be posted here. I'm excited to start a new year as it always means a little bit of a clean slate.

Happy New Year, everyone! Welcome to 2012!

Happy New Year to all! Welcome 2012!

2011-12-31T12:26:00.000-08:00

I wish for you (and me) a happy and safe New Year's Eve and New Year. I welcome 2012 with all its lessons and joys. I hope the lessons are gentle and the joys many.

Thank you to any of you who stop by here to visit. I hope you will continue to do so. I'm looking forward to another year of WildRumpusing with you.

2011 On the Way Out

2011-12-30T23:59:00.000-08:00

It is hard to believe the year is drawing to a close...time is such a weird thing. In so many ways, the year has gone by very slowly and in other ways, it has whizzed past me. I feel a pull to look back, but as I have said, when I do look back, I'm not finding anything too remarkable. So, the last few days of the year are really looking ahead to what is coming up in 2012.

I will have to go back and read the end of 2010 to verify, but I feel very happy that 2012 is almost here. I have some plans for myself, large and small and I'm excited to start. Obviously, I don't have to wait until then, but sometimes, having a clear starting point, starting off with a clean slate and an easy date to remember for something new is a good thing.

I hope I'm not ultimately disappointed in myself. I'm trying to just go into this with some excitement and also the knowledge that I will make mistakes and I will not succeed the first time (or the second or the third) sometimes. That's okay. For me, the trying is important. The imperfection is important. I have a lot of lessons I need to learn and I'm trying to just be open to learning them and taking it all in.

Okay. I'm just going around in circles...I do that sometimes. I'm going to sign off for now. I will be back again for the last day of 2011...Crazy, huh?

Visitor in Town

2011-12-29T23:59:00.000-08:00

I have a friend visiting town this weekend. Very fun. Lots of movies and lots of talking and hanging out and hopefully, some art. :)

I'm keeping this one short.

Endings

2011-12-28T23:59:00.000-08:00

I know that we are coming up on the end of the year in a few days. Last year, I participated in the Reverb10 but I was left somewhat uninspired. I worked on Reverb11 a little this year, but wasn't consistent. When I read other bloggers reflections back on the year, I realized that I didn't share that experience of learning something, having a most memorable moment, etc. This year was a year of work and some play, some travel, little vacation. I didn't see many movies, I didn't read many books. If something spectacular happened, I usually wrote about it here. I had some strange adventures in performance interpreting, experienced some of the usual frustrations and joys most people experience in a year.

This year, 2012, I'm going to try to see if I can't up the ante a bit and give myself some reasons and methods for remembering. I haven't got it all figured out, but I do have some classes and things coming up that I think will be good for me to start figuring it all out.

As 2011 ends, I feel at a bit of a loss. This was a strange year for me. Pretty mellow in many ways. I think that's okay, too.

Goal for 2012

2011-12-27T23:59:00.000-08:00

One of my goals for 2012 should be to hear WHAT people are saying and not HOW they are saying it. Sometimes, the how overwhelms the words. I usually hear the words, but what I remember is the tone of voice, the presentation. I need to just hear the words and not react or feel that the tone represents what the person is feeling towards me. The older I get, the more I realize that most often, their stuff has little to nothing to do with me on the outset. How I react may determine if it BECOMES about me and I would like that to happen less and less.

We'll see how it goes.

Winter Cleanse

2011-12-26T23:02:00.000-08:00

I literally started cleaning and going through stuff about 30 minutes after I got up today and I didn't stop until about 9:00pm. So, in lieu of a thoughtful or humorous post, I offer this video from a slam poet about teachers. Love it.

Tis the Season to Be Jolly...Fa La la la la.

2011-12-25T23:59:00.000-08:00

Well, another Christmas come and gone. What a relief.

I tried really hard to be in the spirit, to enjoy what I could and try to let go of the other stuff. I had moderate success. There are just so many things I don't understand about people's behavior and the choices they make. I don't understand why we have this maniacal drive to force everyone to come together in a short span of time and pretend like everything is "JUST GREAT". Honestly, it would be more fun and more enjoyable if we could stop pretending that everything is perfect and go for normal.

Through it all, I have decided that I should take up meditation in 2012 and work harder to make myself happy so that it doesn't matter when these little things happen.

I took some first steps that I mentioned a few posts ago. Second step taken today - I'm going to partake in the 37Days Book Club. Patti Digh is having a special year-long "charter membership" for half price. I'm already signed up and ready to go. Join us! I can't wait!

I hope everyone had a good holiday, stress and all. I know everyone tries hard and sometimes we have more success than others. I feel like I missed the mark in some ways this year, but I was trying.

"Home is Where the Heart Is"

2011-12-24T23:01:00.000-08:00

I was reminded of this song tonight as I was watching the "Peter, Paul and Mary Holiday Concert". I heard this song for the first time when they were singing it. This is a lovely version.

Merry Christmas.

Sparkle Goes Christmas Shopping

2011-12-23T23:26:00.000-08:00

First of all, yes, I am getting as much mileage out of *Sparkle* as I can because I know it will go away soon and I am enjoying it too much. :)

So, I finished my Christmas shopping today (I kept putting it off on the way home from work). Overall, it wasn't too bad because I had decided that whatever got done was going to be as good as it gets. The traffic was pretty bad around town, but I was listening to "West Side Story" as prep for my show, so I didn't really care about that.

The one thing that was the most challenging and really put a damper on my whole experience was the number of shoppers who were on their cell phones in the store, standing in the center of the aisle with their carts just gabbing on the phone. Really? It's amazing we ever lived a day without being on the phone 24/7!

In particular, one woman in the toy section with her poor husband. He stood dutifully by watching as his wife, clearly dulled from all the electronic signals zapping her brain, stood in the middle of the toy aisle talking on the phone. Even when I said, "Excuse me" for the third time, she didn't move. Every time I went down an aisle, there she was. There he was. Looking apologetic, but not apologetic enough to MOVE THE CART. Mostly, I just walked away and tried another approach to get where I was going. Finally, after the fourth or fifth encounter, I just pushed on by. I did see them in another area later, so I went out of my way to walk through the book section so that I wouldn't have to deal with them.

I will never understand the need to be on the phone every waking moment. I will never understand constantly being on the phone in stores (or anywhere else). I can feel my feet fossilizing as I type. I don't care. I still don't get it.

"Sparkle" Part Deux

2011-12-22T23:13:00.000-08:00

Ha! I have had several addresses of "Hi, Sparkle" on Facebook and a couple of people at work who were game. I don't know why this is cracking me up so much, but I'm just going to bask in it.

Sometimes, you just have to let loose, ya know?

I'm eager to do some art but I have to finish shopping and wrap some gifts before I can dive in. My Secret Santa at work brought me a big bag full of collage bits and I can't wait to use them. I think I will use some of it to make my 2012 calendar art pages. Can't wait!

Sparkle Holidays

2011-12-21T23:59:00.000-08:00

I have not mastered the art of taking a digital picture of myself - my head is always half out of the photo and my arm isn't long enough to get the shirt AND my head in it...so this is a photo of my "Sparkle" shirt - I get to wear it a couple of times a year. I don't know why it cracks me up. Maybe because I don't consider myself sparkly.

So I wore Sparkle to work today and one of my co-workers immediately said, "Well, hello Sparkle." It cracked me up. All. day. long.

Then I went out to dinner with some friends and they, too, commented on sparkle. Again, I think because I'm not really sparkly. A few minutes ago, I posted this photo on my FaceBook page and said something to the effect of "I am considering the wisdom of being called "Sparkle" through the remainder of the holiday season unless a more formal address is required. Discuss." I'm eager to see what people say to this silly request which is somewhat unlike me these days.

Shopping Interrupted

2011-12-20T23:59:00.000-08:00

So, I left work a little early today. I thought I would hit a couple of stores (very specific stores) on the way home. That was before the accident on I-5 south and the bad drivers and the back ups all over town, even on exits where there were not malls. It took an hour and a half to drive home and then when I tried to stop at one of the stores I wanted to go to, there was no place to park and I had to go to the bathroom. I drove home with the intention of using the restroom and going right back out again. But I didn't. I got home and changed my clothes and didn't go anywhere.

And I'm not sad about it. I will finish shopping on Thursday or Friday. I don't have much left to do. And I have a plan. That's always good.

Plus - good news! My new Kelly Kilmer art journal class is up and running a couple of days early! Yay!

Reading Time!

2011-12-19T23:58:00.000-08:00

I have been searching for something *anything* to read that would hold my interest. Apparently, I have the attention span of a flea now, so it is a lot harder for me to get into a book these days. I started reading "The Help" and I was enjoying it but I got distracted and just never made it back. I think that having books in a Kindle makes it a lot easier to forget what I was reading - I don't have the book cover calling to me from where ever I placed it.

I started reading "The Hunger Games" this weekend and I'm very intrigued. i selected it because it is a series and lots of people seem to be enjoying it or at least talking about it. I'm pretty sure it is a Young Adult (YA) novel, but that's okay. Next series will probably be the Tiger series by Colleen Houck. I know her from work - she was an interpreter I worked with until she became an author and started literally touring the country.

Anyway, I'm happy to be an active reader again. It has been a long while.

Holiday Spirit

2011-12-18T15:31:00.000-08:00

At work, we are having a potluck tomorrow. I normally don't partake much as I generally don't like most of the things that are brought to a potluck and I often just pick up something from the store. Yes, I'm one of "those" people - I bring chips and dip, beverages, store bought fruit/veggie trays. This year, I thought I would do something different. I'm still going to being some fruit and veggies, but I decided to make some "Muddy Buddies" as I found the recipe on Pinterest. :) Mine isn't going to be as fancy as the presentation I found online, but they will taste good.

Here are pictures of round one:

All the fixins.

Ready for round two.

Next?

Tray #1

Tray #2

Revisiting RENT

2011-12-17T12:17:00.000-08:00

I missed the off-Broadway cast of the "Rent" revival this morning on the CBS Early Show (it was on at 6:45am, so I'm not surprised that I missed it). I couldn't get the video that was posted on Facebook to play so I went back to YouTube and ended up finding one of my favorite actors who played Roger singing "One Song Glory" on "The Jenny Jones" show. Now, I've never watched that show, but I have seen this video - it is Manley Pope as Roger. I saw him perform 2 times on Broadway.

Photos and Books

2011-12-16T23:24:00.000-08:00

I'm thinking I need to take some photos or do something with my camera and post some photos. It has been a while.

I'm going to skimp on the blog post tonight and actually go read a book. I have been thinking about it all week (reading) and now I have time. :) Yay! More tomorrow, but for tonight, adieu.

New Year's A-Coming

2011-12-15T23:59:00.000-08:00

I can't wait for the new year to start. I have big plans at work, big plans in my life, big plans for the blog...

Right now, I'm signed up for several classes. The blogging one (see the button on the right hand side of the blog), a lettering workshop with Joanne Sharpe, a Kelly Kilmer art journaling class and a storytelling class from Ali Edwards. None of the start yet and I am ITCHING to start. I'm just feeling full of energy and excitement for moving forward.

Good clean fun.

Cutting it Close

2011-12-14T23:59:00.000-08:00

Normally, I don't like to leave things to the last minute. For interpreters, we have continuing education units that we have to earn to maintain our certification. We have to earn 80 hours of workshop/class/training time every 4 years. My cycle ends on Dec. 31 and I just completed the final .125 hours of my requirements. I'm a little bit over the amount required, but I like it that way in case someone drops the ball out there.

This is the first time I have been so close to the deadline - I blame it on having a full-time job. And, I took some workshops in the past couple of years that I didn't get the proper paperwork turned in ahead of time, so I didn't earn the CEUs for it, even though I did attend. Dumb.

So, I have already started on my next cycle - paying for it anyway. I am going to TerpExpo in January where I will be able to earn at least a couple of CEUs. I have found several good on-line places to do some work and I am working on some projects. My goal is to do 30 hours a year so that by the last year, even if I don't have to do anything, I will be a little bit over and will have continued to develop my skills and learning. I actually can't wait to get started!

Now, wish me luck that all the people who are responsible for reporting these things does their job so that I'm not fighting to keep my certification. On second thought, I may be doing another short one this weekend, just to be sure...

All I Want for Christmas

2011-12-13T23:42:00.000-08:00

I really just want a week off at the beach with a good book and some music. And my reading glasses. I want to read until my eyes fall out. It will happen. Not yet, but it will. I am taking some time off around the holidays, but it isn't a "go to the beach and relax" kind of time off. That's okay. Maybe I will get to read for a while. I hope so.

Headache - Go Away!

2011-12-12T23:59:00.000-08:00

I had one of those days today - I started with a headache - maybe sinus, I'm not sure. The kind of headache where you have to pinch the bridge of your nose to make the pain bearable. Then, I did payroll all day which required me to look up and down from paper to computer screen for about 4 hours. Usually, I can either just look at a paper or look at the monitor, but not back and forth that way. One of the programs I use for payroll changed and I couldn't figure it out, so I had to use the manual paperwork this time. This made my head hurt more and that went down into my neck and shoulders.

In the late afternoon, the sun moves around (this is new for me in my new office space) so that the glare on my monitor is such that I can't see much of anything. I tried moving the monitor, I tried tipping the angle up and down. I tried moving the blinds - no go. We are in a high-ish building and on the 6th floor so the blinds do not close all the way. Someone once told me that if the blinds close all the way, they create air pressure that can cause the windows to burst. I guess that would be bad, but I can't see my computer for 2-3 hours in the afternoon...I'm going to request some film or something because it is driving me crazy.

Luckily, I came home, took some ibuprofen, had some dinner, used my massage pad on my chair and it felt much better. I hope it doesn't come back tomorrow.

Friends and Memories

2011-12-11T23:59:00.000-08:00

Had dinner with a couple of friends from my checkered past. One person I see pretty regularly, so our focus is mostly on the here and now and the other person I haven't seen since 2008. We ate at Typhoon! in Beaverton - it was okay, but Thai Terrace is better! :) I should have known that.

My biggest regret - I brought my camera and forgot it in the car. I didn't realize it until I was getting in the car to drive away. Bummer.

It is amazing how much we change in a relatively short time - all of us. We are all calmer and more settled in our lives, a little more serious, a little more focused. Good in many ways but sad in others. There is still so much to enjoy and to celebrate. I'm sure if we were all around each other more, we would get to that - just interesting to see.

The Real Thing

2011-12-10T23:59:00.000-08:00

Adele - "Someone Like You"

I'm taking an online workshop on interpreting music right now and I had to go on YouTube and find an ASL interpreted/performed song and watch it for the workshop. I found a couple of pretty good ones and some terrible ones. I chose the first one I came across and it was to Adele. I listened to it several times and watched several versions of the ASL. Finally, I had to look up Adele, herself.

First off, she is GORGEOUS. I love her look - eyes, hair, makeup. Beautiful woman.

Here is "Turning Tables" by Adele, as well. Just because.

Friday Vibe

2011-12-09T23:59:00.000-08:00

It seemed very much like a Friday today and I stayed confused all day, thinking that it was Friday. When the day finally came to a close, I knew that it was, in fact, Thursday, and I still had a day left to deal with.

This week has been fairly intense just because it is fourth quarter and everything is wrapping up - lots of things due for the end of the year in addition to all the other "every day" things that have to be done.

Here's hoping that this weekend will provide some much needed R&R. I'm counting the days, too, until I get to take my "Blogging course" (you can find out more by clicking on the button on the top, right hand side button - pretty sure it is the first little badge on the page).

Another Art Class!!

2011-12-08T23:59:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited - I had found a blogger/artist on Tumblr (I think) who I admire so much, then I found her blog. She incorporates lettering in most of her work and it is BEAUTIFUL!!

Today, as I was bopping around my usual web-haunts, I found out that she is offering a class in 2012! A lettering class! That's what I need!

So, for anyone who is interested: "Letter Love 101: Art Journaling" starts on February 1, 2012 for $35. The class is taught by Joanne Sharpe and her Etsy store is here. I know I'm probably biting off more than I can chew this year, but I'm excited to work on lettering - it is the area I am most interested in and where I don't really have much working knowledge or skill.

If you are interested in this class or want to see her art work, go to Joanne Sharpe's Letter Love 101: Art Journaling class.

I'm so excited! :)

P.S. I know this is a little link-crazy, but I want to be sure that I give all credit where it is due. I don't know Ms. Sharpe and I am not being paid or rewarded to advertise her class - I'm just excited to take it and I love her art.

Reverb11 - Music

2011-12-07T23:59:00.000-08:00

From this blog: DAY 7: MUSIC
What were some of your favorite records and songs? What song will always remind you of this year?

Almost all my favorite songs came from "Glee" this year. There might be one or two that I heard elsewhere, but mostly, "Glee".
Loving all the Kristin Chenoweth songs from the first season - particularly "One Less Bell To Answer/A House is Not a Home"...well, really all of them.

"Firework" by Katy Perry (I like Lea Michele's version, too)

"Turning Tables" by Adele and well-sung by Gwenyth Paltrow on "Glee"

Really, any Adele song.
Love Pink's music - several songs. Right now, I'm loving "Raise Your Glass".
I'm also still loving Carrie Underwood's music.

I spent a lot of my art journaling time with the "Glee Jukebox" on this summer, so those are the standouts that I remember. I don't buy many CDs anymore - just not up on new music too much.

Reverb11 - Breakthroughs

2011-12-06T23:59:00.000-08:00

From this blog...DAY 6: BREAKTHROUGHS
What were your biggest breakthroughs? This can be in any area: emotional, spiritual, career, etc.

I think I had a couple of breakthroughs this year, to be honest, and some back-sliding, too.

Breakthrough 1: I'm not responsible for other people's happiness, only my own.
Breakthrough 2: If I want something, I have to make it happen. Waiting doesn't do anything but make me yearn.
Breakthrough 3: Feeding myself (emotionally, spiritually, physically) helps me become more of who I want to be. I haven't quite got this down though - it is a tiny crack of a breakthrough that I understand but haven't fully implemented/embraced/fulfilled.
Breakthrough 4: Returning to a spiritual practice grounds me.

These seem simple and obvious, but really living them - believing them - that's the key. I have scratched the surface of all of these issues before (sometimes more than one time) but every time I revisit them, I get to go deeper, find more, commit more.

Reflection - Growing Into Looking Back

2011-12-05T23:59:00.000-08:00

I started looking at sites where the bloggers were doing Reverb2011 or Reverb11, as it were. I did it last year, but I found the questions to be too repetetive and I got bored with myself. I found a couple of places this year where the questions were more reflective of the year 2011 and lss repetetive, but I realized I didn't really have an answer to many of the questions they were asking. It sort of made me think that I need to be paying more attention to my life...

So, I still haven't committed to anything for December yet, other than writing in the blog every day and doing some art journaling this month.

I want to enter 2012 with some purpose and thoughtfulness. I don't need resolutions, per se, but I like the idea of having some questions in mind as I go through the year. I think reflection is like any other skill - you have to practice. I have practiced in some ways, but in many others, I haven't really reflected in a way that is meaningful to me or to anyone else.

Something to strive for, right?

"Just The Way You Are" in ASL

2011-12-04T23:59:00.000-08:00

I love this song and I love this guy's videos. Lovely.

It Gets Better, but We Have to Start Now

2011-12-03T23:59:00.000-08:00

I saw this posted on facebook. It is heartbreaking, but important.

NaBloPoMo November Prompt #30: What did you learn?

2011-12-02T21:41:00.000-08:00

NaBloPoMo November 30 Prompt: What did you learn from doing NaBloPoMo?

Well, obviously, this isn't my first venture into NaBloPoMo. I like having something to look to each day that I need to do. I do write a post every day, but sometimes I get a day behind in the dates. I don't feel pressure from that anymore - I just keep writing. It is a way to hold myself accountable to keep blogging.

As I said in another post, I'm taking a course in January on improving the blog - I'm excited for the parts about generating content and beating writer's block. I am also hoping I can figure out what I'm trying to accomplish here - it is something more than just an on-line diary and something less than trying to make my living doing this. I just feel like I have a lot to do and say and see and this works for me...I just want to do it better. I want to engage readers more, I want to keep things exciting (or at least interesting!) for myself and for everyone who is gracious enough to come here.

So, now we are counting down to the new year and some new stuff. :)

World AIDS Day 2011

2011-12-01T23:59:00.000-08:00

Remembering Roby, Dan, Chris, Dean, Allan, Lady Elaine Peacock and many others who left this world too soon.

Someday, we will be able to celebrate the eradication of AIDS and HIV on this planet. I can't wait.

Here is the last scene from "Longtime Companion". I think of this scene a lot...

Blinking into December

2011-11-30T23:57:00.000-08:00

I can't believe that today is the last day of November! Time does really fly by more and more as I get older. It is disconcerting sometimes how quickly and easily I lose track of the days and the time.

Looking back on the year so far, I feel pretty good about it in many ways. I think I have done some things and developed some habits that really have helped me relax and enjoy life a little more. There are other things I haven't done (like getting a regular reading practice again) that I hope to accomplish in 2012, or at least start.

I'm already thinking about the new year - no resolutions, just thoughts for the year and goals I want to accomplish.

NaBloPoMo Prompt #25: Gift Giving

2011-11-29T23:59:00.000-08:00

NaBloPoMo Prompt: Do you like to buy presents ahead of time or right when you need to give them?

One year, I decided that I wanted to be done with Christmas shopping early and I started shopping in September - I would just buy things as I saw them for people. I wanted to buy things people would really, really like. As the time went on, I kept finding other things. Then I started to question if the first or second or third things were the right things. Ultimately, I ended up spending about 3 times more money than I wanted to because I kept on buying stuff right up until Christmas Eve. Instead of being smart and spacing the gifts out, I gave them all and it was actually a little embarrassing. The gigantic pile of gifts really seemed crazy. I loved giving people the gifts but it sort of reset the expectations to quantity when really my goal was quality.

After that experience, I decided that I could start in early December but that was about as good as it gets. If I see something really special, I can buy that, but for the most part, I wait.

As for birthdays and whatnot, I usually wait until close to the event - these days, if you buy something ahead of time that you know someone wants, they usually have purchased it by the time the gift-giving holiday rolls around. I usually email myself ideas when I see them and then try to check before the holiday to see if they already have the item or not.

NaBloPoMo Prompt #24: Alone time

2011-11-28T23:59:00.000-08:00

From NaBloPoMo November Prompts: Do you enjoy being alone? Would you rather be around other people?

I know that many people would describe me as an extrovert - I like people, I like talking to people, social time is a good thing - necessary. At the same time, it takes a lot of energy for me to do that - emotionally. It always has.

For me, I like a balance - alone time is time to recharge my batteries, to let the masks down. It would be disingenuous to say that I don't have my social masks up most of the time - I think most people DO. For me, I have to have some amount of time that I'm not trying top please others or to figure out what I need to do if I want to please others. I'm getting better about that, but it is still something I have to work against.

I love listening to music and playing solitaire on the computer when I need to relax. I usually end up in cathartic tears - no reason - the music just moves me. I also love to read although I don't do as much as I used to. Being on the computer so much takes its toll and I sometimes just don't have the brain cells or eyes to sit and read for too long. I know that I just have to start reading more and it will grow itself. I guess that's on my list of things to do again for 2012. I will keep at it until I succeed.

Right now, for me, I think the answer to this question is that I like to be alone. I know that later that may change, but for now, that seems like the right answer.

Back Into the Fray

2011-11-27T23:54:00.001-08:00

Well, back to work I go tomorrow. I feel pretty rested at this point, but I would love another day off to ENJOY and maybe go and do something. Today, I had some rating to do for a job and that took up a big chunk of the afternoon. I should have gone to the movies or something, but I didn't.

Just changing the routine from the day-to-day is a pleasure on the weekends. Not having to wake to an alarm, even when I wake up almost as early, sometimes earlier. Not having to hurry to get ready and leave the house for the better part of the day is good, too.

Tomorrow, I have to go to Michael's to pick up Gesso. I know I haven't been posting much art journaling here, but I have been prepping a new journal. I found a journal project I really liked using a composition notebook and I have been working on getting that ready. I had to make the pages thicker - two pages glued together and then something glued on to thicken it up. I used National Geographic pages. Now, gesso (my first venture with gesso) so that I can move forward. I'm very excited about this journal - really different than anything I have done before. I will post pictures.

I'm also going to try this little trick...

Happy Birthday, Roby Starns!

2011-11-26T23:59:00.000-08:00

Today, Roby would have been 45! years old. I'm not sure he ever imagined himself at this age. These photos are some of the ways I remember him.
Happy Birthday, Roby. I love and miss you.

Aloha High School, 1984-85

June 1989 at the Civic Auditorium (now Keller) for my college graduation

Roby at Seaside, 1990

No "Black Friday" Shopping This Year

2011-11-25T23:59:00.000-08:00

I'm happy to say that I didn't participate in "Black Friday" shopping this year. I have only done so about twice in my life - the past two years - and the gifts I purchased were for a children's party for Deaf children in the local area.

I'm not morally opposed to shopping, per se. More than anything, for me personally, I don't need/get a rush from a good deal or from standing in line waiting to buy things or from the crush of people (or their guns or pepper spray this year). I'm hoping to buy more from local folks, artists/writers I know, etc. In addition, I prefer gifts that fit the person. I don't need someone to give me some big, extravagant thing to show their regard for me. I would rather have something that is meaningful.

So, I spent a quiet day at home. A little shopping on the internet for items I would have purchased anyway. Nice to have the option to stay home and nice to be able to take it.

WWRT? (What Would Roby Think?)

2011-11-24T23:48:00.000-08:00

I came home from Thanksgiving tonight and turned on the television only to realize that I had not taped the "Very Gaga Thanksgiving" special. I'm a little disappointed, but I watched the very end of it. As I was watching, I wondered what Roby would think (WWRT) of her? I think he would have LOVED HER!!

I often get choked up watching Kurt and his father on Glee for the Same reason - I wish the show had been on when Roby was still alive. He was so tortured by his relationship with his father. I would love to see him watch a good relationship between a gay young man and his father. Not only for the relationship, but for the knowledge that something like that can be on television now. I'm not sure we would have believed it in the 1980s.

Just something I was thinking about on this Thanksgiving night.

Doubt and Self-Care

2011-11-23T23:59:00.000-08:00

So I have been struggling with the blog - I've lost direction. I started out with a really personal journey and then some of that changed. Then I veered into some group participation, I took a telecourse and a writing course, I've been art journaling, learning photography. All of this has been present here, along with some opinions, so silly posts, some videos, and some "life reporting" that gets boring - even for me.

There is so much in my head and so much that I want to do and say and then when I sit down to say it, I'm not always there at that moment. It is frustrating.

So I have signed up for a class that I'm pretty excited about - it starts in January. I feel like I lost my voice somewhere for this blog and I really want to find it. I am so proud of having been here for such a long time, for committing to regular posting - even when it isn't very inspired. That commitment really means something to me and now I want to take it to the next level. I don't plan on being a famous blogger or anything - I just want to be clear about what I'm doing here and what stories I want to tell - what I want to focus on. I haven't been very focused and I need some help in that area.

So, look for some changes in the future - who knows where this will lead me.

This is the class I will be taking:

I'm stoked to take this class! For more info, click here.

Headache Free Day 1

2011-11-22T22:41:00.001-08:00

Well, I woke up this morning headache free, so that was really a relief. 5 days of headache is too much. I have had times today when it threatened to come back, but I think the fact that I don't have the detergent smell on me anywhere is making the difference.

The NaBloPoMo prompt from yesterday asks about our passion projects and whether we are working on ours. I am not. I did not carve out enough time and energy for my passions this year, for the most part. I haven't been working in my art journal and I think that I have been pushing it aside for time, but the real issue is perfectionism. I hate that. I have to conquer it and I'm working on it. I really love just the process and I refuse to let my worries and perfectionism stop me from doing it. Just have to dive back in.

"Mountain Fresh" - Not

2011-11-21T23:59:00.000-08:00

So, my headache is still here...it is from my laundry detergent. It doesn't SMELL bad, just chemical-y and persistent. I can smell it all day long. My head is throbbing and I can't really concentrate on anything.

Headaches and Peeves

2011-11-20T23:41:00.000-08:00

Headaches: I have had a raging headache for several days - tension, I think. It is from the top of my head down through my neck and shoulders and to the middle of my back. I am feeling better now than I have since...maybe Thursday. Ibuprofen helps some, relaxing helps some, eating some protein at regular intervals seems to take it down a notch. I'm a bigger baby about headaches now that I don't really have them that often. It is hard to get things done when your head is pounding so hard.

Peeves: Superior attitudes about things that don't have a superior/inferior relationship.

Case in point: Morning people versus night people. Isn't it a good thing that everyone is different? If everyone was the same, there would be at least 50% of the population who would be even more unhappy than they already are- having to function at times of day when they don't function well. I don't understand why the time of day you prefer to get up or to work or to read the paper matters in the least. Frankly, I don't care what time people choose to get up. Does it make you happy? Does it work in your world? If yes, GREAT! If no, can you change it? There isn't more or less value - it is just different.

This issue has always bothered me, so I know it is a pet peeve of mine. Honestly, I don't consider sleeping until 8 a.m. a crime or a triumph. And I don't consider getting up at 4:30a.m. saintly or evil. I remember my father getting up to go to work super early when I was about 5 or 6 years old. He had to be at work at 4:30a.m. when he was teaching in the Air Force. He hated it. Hated coming home and eating dinner and having to go to bed so early. I remember when he didn't have to do that anymore EVERYBODY was happier, if you know what I mean. :)

I have always been a night owl - since I was really young. I can get up early, can get up early for long stretches of time. Left to my natural rhythms, I would go to sleep late and get up around 9 a.m. or so. Most important to me now is getting enough sleep, but it doesn't really matter when it happens. I find that I often wake up early on the weekends - I think it is something mental related to getting all I can out of the weekend. Getting up early those days helps keep the schedule during the week, though. When I used to sleep later on the weekends, I often had trouble getting to sleep during the week.

NaBloPoMo Prompt 18: Happiest Moment

2011-11-19T23:59:00.000-08:00

What has been the happiest moment of your life thus far?

I don't know if it is just me - I find all these kinds of questions really difficult to answer. Is it because I feel the pressure of trying to come up with something or is it that I just don't remember? I have had many happy days and many happy things have happened to me. The happiest moment? I have no idea. I guess they all blend together after a while.

Some of the top choices would be:

Seeing "Les Miserables" the first time
Interpreting "Les Miserables" the first time
Interpreting on Broadway (I did one scene in "Miss Saigon" with my "Interpreting for the Theatre" workshop group)
Visiting NYC the first time (and every time after that)
some of the parties with Amy and Todd and the gang
time at the beach with Roby
BookFests with Kevin

I'm sure there are things I'm forgetting, but honestly, I just don't know what I would call "the happiest moment of my life so far". I guess that means I have had lots of happy moments...

NaBloPoMo Prompt 16: Leaving Childhood

2011-11-18T23:59:00.000-08:00

What is the moment that you leave childhood and enter adulthood? (Guest Post by Catherine Gildiner, author of After the Falls)

This is an interesting question. I think that when we are lucky, we may enter adulthood in a positive way and continue to maintain a part of childhood that sustains us and keeps us young-at-heart. I guess that is a little bit too whoo whoo. The truth is that many of us enter adulthood when a something jolts us out of our innocence. For others, it is a slow, gradual process.

For me, I think the thing that defined my entrance into adulthood was when Roby found out he had HIV. That was sort of a defining moment in my life in so many ways - it was the first time we had to really face our mortality, the first time I didn't believe my life would work out the way I'd always thought it would. It was the first time I gave up on dreams I had had since my early childhood.

At the same time, the jolt into adulthood allowed me to understand and value the moments I could still access my childhood, my child-mind, my enjoyment of simple joys. Knowing that it can all be taken away at any moment helps accentuate the appreciation of those things.

I don't know if this makes any sense at all. It has been a long week and I'm tired, so maybe that's just where my brain is today.

Crazy Target Lady, Part II

2011-11-17T23:59:00.000-08:00

Some of you may have read my post about the Crazy Target Lady from last year...

She's back. I saw her last night and again tonight. I think it is interesting that they are only showing ads featuring her in late night ads, like those party line phones where you can "chat" with "singles in your area". I guess they realized that the crazed shopper was scaring little kids and they only trot her out after everyone has gone to bed. So far, she has been on the same channel, as well. Maybe the other networks are boycotting her.

Anyway, viewer beware!

Wednesday Gratitude

2011-11-16T23:48:00.000-08:00

I have been feeling like I'm not showing my gratitude for my life lately. I think I have been tired and so that shows in my writing, in my attitude, in everything I do (or don't do).

I am grateful for lots of things and I wanted to list some of them here to remind myself to see those blessings for what they are instead of wanting things to be different or better.

I'm grateful for (in no particular order and not limited to):

love of family
love of friends
a good job
rewarding work to do
musical theatre
Glee
my happy yellow car
BTVS
books and Bookfest
so many other things...I have a good life.

Dawn's In Trouble, It Must Be Tuesday

2011-11-15T23:59:00.000-08:00

That line, the heading of this post, is from one of my favorite episodes of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer". Have I said lately how much I love that show? I've probably seen every episode at least 10 times, but I still see and hear new things every time I go through the series. I would love to take one of those classes where they analyze the episodes for archetypes and mythical themes. If people watched the show, they would each find aspects of their own personality in all the characters. Love it!

The only bad thing is that I have seen all the episodes. I finished Season 7 a couple of weeks ago, so I will probably wait a while to watch it again. I just thought of that quote and since today is Tuesday, I just decided to go with it.

Chaos Everywhere

2011-11-14T23:03:00.000-08:00

I watched the Occupy Portland situation yesterday until I couldn't stand to listen to the media anymore. I find most of this stuff just makes me crazy - I want to know what's going on, but I don't want to have to listen to the people who are telling the story.

I keep telling people that my feet are fossilizing as the smart phone/tablet/4G/App world continues its march across our lives and our souls. I'm not opposed to technology, but I know it has limitations. Once the shine is off the new toys, people will start to come back to what is real and lasting - human connections.

I never would have expected to see the world in such a crazy state of chaos. I guess it is cyclical and this is our time to see things through to the next world. Hopefully, we have all learned a lot about where we don't want to go and maybe we can make some good things happen. I certainly hope so.

**Sorry for the vagueness of this post - my brain didn't really land on anything specific today, so you just get to see my brain right before it is time to go to bed. :)

NaBloPoMo Prompt #10: My Passion

2011-11-13T23:59:00.000-08:00

From NaBloPoMo Prompts: What is your secret (or not-so-secret) passion? (Guest Post by Jean Kwok, author of Girl in Translation)

I have a couple of passions - I don't always indulge in them, but they are there, certainly.

Passion #1: Musical theatre - in whatever form. I love musical theatre - live, on film, on DVD, documentary, the whole show, the CDs, everything about it. It makes my heart beat faster and it makes me sit on the edge of my seat. I remember seeing "Les Miserables" in the Broadway theatre in NYC and I literally thought I would just die right there, a happy woman.

Passion #2: reading. I miss losing myself in a book. I'm not sure what happened or why I'm not in a space where I'm reading much. I think it definitely impacts me - reading has always been a place for me to escape and to use my imagination. I guess I have just been tired and I haven't made the time to read. I need to do that. Reading Renaissance again. Maybe third time's a charm?

I think both of these are my long-term passions - they have been with me for years and years. I have other passions, but some of them are quite new - mostly, art journaling. I could probably name a bunch, but I think these things are the ones that are most impactful and keep me sane.

Art Journal Catch Up

2011-11-12T23:59:00.000-08:00

Here are some photos of art journal pages that I have done in the last couple of weeks:

NaBloPoMo Post #9: Different House?

2011-11-11T23:59:00.000-08:00

When was the first time that you realized that your home was not like other people’s homes? (Guest Post by Catherine Gildiner, author of After the Falls)

When I was 12 years old, my family moved from Panama City, Florida to Portland. We moved into an older, but big, nice house. In Florida, everything was cheaper - we lived in a military area and the economy there was depressed. The house my parents bought was double the price they had sold our 3 year old house for in Florida. Once I started making some friends, I had them come over and I would go over to their house.

One friend lived quite a distance from us, so she would ride the bus home with me and then my mom would drive her home. One time, her mother said she would pick her up on her way home. When she arrived, she rang the bell and I let her in. The kitchen was right by the front entry way and I introduced her to my mother while her daughter was getting her coat.

My friend's mother looked around in the entry and the kitchen area and said to my mother, "Well, it's not bad, but I would never live in a USED home." Even at the age of 12, I knew that this woman had just ripped on my mother, my father and everything about us. My mother smiled and was very friendly and welcoming. Luckily, they left pretty quickly. I never invited the daughter to my house again.

My mother still remembers that comment and the woman who made it. Even though she never said it, I think it cut her to the bone. I always regretted having that woman come to our house.

I don't know if this is what the prompt was looking for, but when I read the question, this was the story that came to mind.

**I have skipped some prompts that don't resonate for me right now - I may go back to them, I may not.

Treating the Soul - "West Side Story"

2011-11-10T23:59:00.000-08:00

As I wrote yesterday, I went to see "West Side Story" for the 50th anniversary of the film. I have a DVD copy of the movie and I could have just watched it at home, but there is something about the way a movie on the big screen engulfs you and how sitting in a darkened room with other people who share your love of a movie can enrich the experience.

As I watched the film, I was immediately jetted back to the first time I saw the movie. I was 14 and I watched it in the library after school with a couple of friends as a supplemental experience to go with reading "Romeo and Juliet" in my English class. We watched the movie over the course of about 3-4 days. I remember bawling at the end - one of my friends sat in amazement. "It's just a movie..." he said.

For me, there is just something magic and timeless about "West Side Story". The beautiful music, clever lyrics, the dancing, the actors, the voices. The issues are all still there, if a bit more rough around the edges now.

The other reason I went, aside from this being one of my favorite movies, EVER, is that I want to support FathomEvents in putting out these kind of events. They have been responsible for putting "Rent", "Les Miserables", "Phantom of the Opera" and now "West Side Story" in the theatre. It is such a great opportunity for folks to access theatre with their families and not break the bank. I know if my family had brought me to this kind of event (if they had been available), it would have meant the world to me. I have seen kids at these performances and it makes me so happy to see families accessing these wonderful events.

"West Side Story" Almost Cures What Ails Me

2011-11-09T23:19:00.000-08:00

I went to the 50th Anniversary of the release of "West Side Story" on film. It was worth a late night and hurrying out of work when I felt like I needed to to stay to finish some stuff up.

I had a crap-a-licious day and then I got to watch one of my ALL-TIME favorite movies. It almost makes it all better except that it is still going to be there tomorrow. But I will feel better, so that's a good thing.

I would like to institute mandatory "Musical Theatre Breaks" at work. I don't think anyone else would enjoy it as much as I would, but since it will never happen, I like to think about it. It makes me smile.

Link Love Long Overdue

2011-11-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

I haven’t done a Link Love post in a long time (if ever). I think I link to people when I write a post about them, but I thought I would just do a list of some of my current favorite blogs. I still visit my friends on other blogs, but these are the ones I visit regularly:

http://www.3x3x365.blogspot.com/ - 3 Friends, 3 States, Sharing one photo every day of 2011

http://kellykilmer.blogspot.com/ - mixed media artist and teacher – lots of art journaling ideas and classes

http://joannezsharpe.blogspot.com/ - I’m in LOVE with her style – lots of color and words mixed with tons of great ideas

http://www.ihanna.nu/ - art journal and other ideas

http://thebloggess.com/ - just hysterical. Sick, but hysterical!

http://teeshascircus.blogspot.com/ - her art started me down the art journaling path

http://www.dblogala.com/ - doodler extraordinaire

NaBloPoMo Prompt #4: Pen or Computer?

2011-11-07T19:30:00.000-08:00

When you are writing, do you prefer to use a pen or a computer?

I prefer to use a pen when I’m writing, but my wrists don’t really like it much. My hands will start to hurt after a while. I think there is just something much more kinesthetic about writing by hand and with a pen. Pens have a certain feel to them that I love – a smooth gel pen traveling down the page is the best thing. Again, since I haven’t really sat down to write anything creative or of substance, I haven’t really done any work with a pen unless it was in my art journal.

I’m still thinking about writing a play and that would definitely be easier to write on a computer with a playwriting program instead of writing it out and then trying to format it back into something. I don’t know why a play has been on my mind…it just feels like that is where my mind wants to go. I don’t know if it will ever come to fruition, but I want to try.

NaBloPoMo Prompt #3: Music and Writing

2011-11-06T18:01:00.000-08:00

Can you listen to music and write? What song did you hear today?

Sometimes I will put the Glee Jukebox in while I am working on the blog or when I am working on some other writing project. I think once I am concentrating, I kind of block it out. Some days I can listen to music and write or anything else and some days I just need some silence.

Honestly, I haven’t sat down to a serious writing session in so long, I don’t know if I could really write something of substance with music playing. Maybe with something instrumental or something, but I think lyrics probably distract me.

The song I heard today that is still running through my head is “Turning Tables” sung on Glee by Gwenyth Paltrow. I haven’t heard the Adele version in a while – I think I will have to look it up.

NaBloPoMo Prompt #2: Last Meal

2011-11-05T17:29:00.001-07:00

If you knew that whatever you ate next would be your last meal, what would you want it to be?

I think this is such a weird question. Every time I read it/hear it, it just strikes me as being weird. What is the last thing I want to eat in my life? I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it that much. I think I would have to say either macaroni and tomato sauce (family recipe) or my mother’s stew. Maybe some massaman curry or Indian food from Matali East in NYC. When I closed my eyes and thought about what flavor I would like to be my last, those two things flashed in my mind.

Honestly, I don’t think my mind would be on eating if I were going to die in the next few hours. I would want to go to the beach with my family and friends and spend the day there, near the water, listening to the waves. I’m sure we would eat, but everything tastes better when you’ve spent the day at the beach.

NaBloPoMo Prompt #1: On Writing

2011-11-04T23:59:00.000-07:00

What is your favourite part about writing?

I miss writing the way I did when I was young. I was fearless. What happens that makes us feel so self-conscious as we get older? I used to write every day – notes, poems, journal stuff, newspaper articles, letters to people – something every day. That is what makes a writer – writing.

These days, I can’t really call what I am doing here as “writing” in the craft sense. I think the blog has days when there is something worth reading from a craft sense, but those days are few and far between. I need to get back to the writing all the time part – my words are a little rusty and dusty and I need to oil them and clean them up and take them out of the attic in order to get better and to enjoy it more.

I guess, from that perspective, my “favorite part” is doing it – that I am committed to documenting something regularly. I aspire to more craft and I need to commit to that part of it – crafting words rather than spitting them out.

There's no place like H...

2011-11-03T23:59:00.000-07:00

ZzzzZzzZzzZzz. I slept on both planes most of the way home today. Totally exhausted. Trip was productive. Needed more time, but glad to be home regardless.

Working from home tomorrow to shake off lingering stomach issues from travel and foreign water.

NaNoJouMo Day 2: Just Breathe

2011-11-02T20:44:00.000-07:00

Just Breathe seems to be the story of my life this week. I think it is good - I haven't been paying enough attention to that kind of thing and I really do need to be more attentive. I know that when I get all whacked out like this, part of the reason is that I haven't really been doing anything outside of work to help me keep my perspective.

I'm working on my journal in the hotel even though I should be going to bed. Pictures when I'm back home.

NaNoJouMo - "Prepping for the Holidays"

2011-11-01T23:59:00.001-07:00

I did work on my journal here in Tampa, but I didn't work on anything holiday related. I only have my blackberry camera and no way to upload the photos (I don't think). I will have to add them in later.

P.S. Today is 11/1/11...weird.

Tuesday Time Zones

2011-11-01T23:59:00.000-07:00

Well, I had a hard time getting up today - time zones and all. I basically got up at 3:30am PST...I didn't sleep well as the neighbors were having a little too good of a time. Eventually, I just turned on the television to drown the noise out. I'm tired tonight, but I'm sure tomorrow it will hit me. Today, I just lost language a few times - I couldn't understand when one of the participants was signing to me - it was just like I had never seen ASL before but I know it was just lack of sleep.

I am doing a separate post for NaNoJouMo (National Non-stop Journaling Month) with one of the blogs I read. Click here for the first day's prompt.

Faster than a Speeding Bullet...?

2011-10-31T22:50:00.000-07:00

And now, I am in Tampa. It is 10:53pm PST so it is VERY LATE here. Rough start to the morning averted by a kind and observant friend who reminded me to BREATHE. Very timely and gave a sharp u-turn to the rest of the day (if you are reading, THANK YOU AGAIN).

I have a few adventures with planes, but that is best saved for tomorrow when I will have more time and more sleep.

Happy Eighth Birthday!

2011-10-30T21:56:00.000-07:00

Moving Day, Two

2011-10-29T23:59:00.000-07:00

Some of today was good. Some of today was not-so-good. Some was easy. Some was hard. I'm exhausted, but I can't get to sleep. And people constantly surprise me - in good and bad ways. I guess that's the spice of life, right?

It's Official

2011-10-28T23:59:00.000-07:00

I hate change.

That is all.

Media Blackout

2011-10-27T23:28:00.000-07:00

I only saw 4 minutes of the news tonight and I realized that I can't look anymore. I had to turn it off. It has taken 22 minutes for my blood pressure to go down...some days it doesn't bother me - their tendency to make everything catastrophic and ridiculous.

I'm taking a couple of busy days as an excuse for a media blackout. I'm sure if I need to know something important, someone will tell me.

Convergence

2011-10-26T23:59:00.000-07:00

All events, projects, jobs, special trips, one-time deals and annual work have all converged into the tiny space of a week and a half.

Next year, I want all of October off, please.

Light Bulb

2011-10-25T23:00:00.000-07:00

I have been struggling with confidence in my interpreting for the last year or so and trying to figure out what I could/would/needed to do about it. I have several plans that I am working through. I have also been frustrated about my input here in the blog. I should recognize that when I am having a hard time finding things to write about it is because I have allowed my world to constrict. I am working on expansion.

Here are some of the things I am working on/thinking about:
1. Arranging fundraiser for community event(s)
2. Creating a professional book group for professional studies credits, but also for contact with other interpreters in a more social venue
3. Creating a peer mentoring group where interpreters can come and do the work and get some constructive feedback, mentoring, set goals, etc.
4. Plan and implement some kind of monthly interpreter gathering during daytime hours - not in a bar. I enjoy the IPAHH (Interpreting Professionals at Happy Hour) when I can go, but Friday night just isn't a night I want to go out after work.

I may or may not succeed with these things, but I wanted to put them out there so that I can hold myself accountable to at least investigate the feasibility of doing some of this. It feels good to be thinking creatively.

No Day But Today

2011-10-24T20:27:00.000-07:00

I love love love this. Beautiful. I need this song in my life...I need to hear it every day.

Day of Nothing

2011-10-23T23:59:00.000-07:00

I am having a "Die Hard" marathon today. I'm tired and overwhelmed and stressed out. I watched "Live Free or Die Hard" and slept through "Die Hard with a Vengeance".

Sleep was good. Just what the doctor ordered.