I don't know why, after all this time, I still ignore my gut on a regular basis. Obviously, there are times when I am paying attention and I follow my instinct. Still, there are these other instances when I have a reaction and I convince myself that I am making up reasons for ignoring my internal compass.
I did it about a month or so ago - my reaction was a loud, emphatic NO! and I talked myself out of it. Luckily, it isn't a high stakes situation, but I am irritated with myself about it now that the situation is coming closer to me. I convinced myself that I was making things up in my head and I TOTALLY WASN'T.
For some reason, I feel like I have to give second, third, seventieth chances. Sometimes, it is a kindness to know how something is going to turn out and just circumvent the inevitable path.
I need to start paying attention to these things again. I got out of practice for a little while, but my eyes are back on the ball.