Where Do I Begin?

When I was in high school, I used to write a ton when I was unhappy or thinking about stuff or feeling lonely or just experiencing the usual teenage angst.  When I was happy, when I was feeling like life was going my way, there was so much less to write about. Not because it wasn't important, but because I was busy living instead of writing about living.

These days, I find that the same is true. I am finding ways to inhabit my days. Not in any special way, not in super memorable ways. Sometimes, yes. Sometimes, no.  But importantly, I am inhabiting my life.  For a long time, I didn't feel like I was.

I have been noticing this in large and small ways.  One funny thing was that I noticed that for a long time, I didn't really have any pictures of myself - either with people or alone. That seems weird, but in this age of selfies and digital photos, it seemed notable in some way.  Then suddenly, a couple of months ago, in some moments of extreme joy, photos started appearing. Smiling, happy photos. Photos where I am me and not afraid to show my true self. I know it sounds a little narcissistic. That's not my intention. I just felt like I disappeared for a while. And now, I'm back.

Friends, life is good. It isn't always easy. It isn't always fun. But life is good.