“As we sail thru life, don't avoid rough waters, sail on because calm waters won't make a skillful sailor” ~ Anonymous
I must be a damn fine "life sailor" if this quote is anything to go by. I know that people say that you attract things into your life based on what you are looking for, but I don't necessarily subscribe to that idea. I believe that we attract things that we need to learn from and that is why chaos is constantly crushing down on me. I am supposed to learn how to manage in chaos.
This week, my boss asked me how I was and I said that my goal was to remain calm. It felt kind of sad to say that as it was TRULY my only goal for that day and really for the rest of the week. I felt so overwhelmed by things and so unable to control the flow of chaos. Change is hard for me (surprise, surprise) and so this constant flow of change just means that I have to maintain my composure and work through it. I know this is the lesson I am supposed to learn. The ante just keeps getting higher and higher and I sometimes wonder where the threshhold is...what will be the thing that I CAN'T handle? That worries me.
So, this week, my goal was to remain calm and I tried a number of things to help me through.
1. Tell people when I need help. I did this to great success this week. I hate hate hate asking for help, but I did it anyway. And everyone was great. I think it helped everyone to stay calm - if they know what I need to make it work, we all pitch in.
2. Eliminate the things that make calm impossible. This week, as I was driving, I turned off the political talk on the radio and put some music on. When the days got really hard, I put on the audio book of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows". Wow! Did that ever make a difference. I just needed something that would engage my brain and not allow me to focus on all the things that were making the week a challenge.
3. Remember to take my vitamins. :)
4. I tried to acknowledge when what I was doing was successful and I didn't try take on any extra stuff. I worked on prioritizing activities and postponing activities that could wait.
All in all, even though I was exhausted by the time I got home last night, I felt pretty good about the way the week went and where I ended up emotionally. Next week is another CRAZY week and I will be out of town for most of it. I'm still figuring out what I will need to do to maintain this little bit of equilibrium that I have right now. Wish me luck!