I wasn't feeling well after dinner tonight - my esophogial spasms again. I know it is stress-related. So I was watching TV - maybe "American Idol" and I saw a commercial for an insurance company that I will not name. It was talking about the economic recovery and how we have learned that what we have isn't as important as the life we have built and the relationships that we have and I had a FLASH moment.
This FLASH moment wasn't something that I didn't know - just something that I regularly need reminders for - this is IT. There isn't some other life or some time when it starts. THIS IS IT. I don't know why that doesn't stay with me all the time. In life's serious moments, I know that this isn't a rehearsal, but the rest of the time, all the times when I am doing things I have to do or things that are not personally fulfilling or don't lead me toward the goals and dreams I have - all those moments seem like barricades or blocks to getting to the "real" part.
I don't know why it hit me tonight more than it has in a while - I guess I'm doing another one of my "life reviews" and I have to take all the different angles into account. I'm not really contemplating radical change in the actual day-to-day part of life, but I am thinking about how to make the day-to-day more meaningful and more enjoyable. I know I have been talking about that here for a long time - I feel like I have made some strides in the right direction - lately, though, I feel like I have been backsliding. Probably because there is a lot happening and I haven't been able to slow down.
So, good things coming up - class on Saturday. I can't wait! This month, I am planning on going to the Interpreter's Professional Happy Hour (if I can figure out which night it is), I have some social engagements and some TIME TO MYSELF. Here's to March. Let's hope it is more calm and a little more focused than February has been.
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