From NaBloPoMo prompt: If your life flashed before your eyes, what are 5 moments you know would be included?
1. Seeing Roby the day he found out he had HIV.
2. The moment Roby died.
3. The moment my father died.
4. The first moments of seeing "Les Miserables" in the Broadway theatre in NYC in 1988.
5. Visiting Switzerland when I was a kid - the cowbells, the green, lush pastures and the Alps all around us. Or the first time I went to a Saturday work party to interview the drama people. I'm pretty sure that Kevin was one of the first people we talked to since we knew him from the journalism (J1) class.
I went to the 25th Anniversary performance of "Phantom of the Opera" at the movie theatre. I like to support these kinds of theatrical special events so that someone will continue to think they are worthwhile endeavors. It was not the same as "Les Miserables" for me - there is a different kind of affection for each show and a different emotional level in each show.
"Phantom" has never been my favorite show, but it has special meanings for me because it was popular when Roby was still vibrant and healthy and we used to sing it together on the way to the beach or just driving around.
The movie version was the actual show - the play was filmed. It was rather spectacular in digital high definition. The woman who played Christine was the original Ariel in the Broadway version of "The Little Mermaid". There were other standouts. The gentleman who played the Phantom was pretty good but a little harsh for me until the end. Honestly, the whole reason to watch the show is the last couple of scenes when Christine finally understands Phantom's pain and can get through to him.
In the movie version, they called Andrew Lloyd Weber to the stage at the end, which was fine. He was fairly emotional - understandably. They had various actors who had played Phantom come and sing and the remaining Original Cast members came out. They had Sarah Brightman sing a song with the 4 chosen Phantoms and then they rushed Michael Crawford onstage briefly. He looked very emotional - they said he had hurried over from another performance elsewhere. I think every person in the audience live and every person watching it in the movie theater was really expecting, hoping, wishing he would sing. He did not. All I could think was that I hoped it was his choice not to sing - rushed and emotional and with something that was over for him so long ago. Either way, it was a little bit anti-climactic. I'm glad I went, but it was no "Les Miz".
I have done 3 shows since the beginning of August. I love theatrical interpreting, don't get me wrong, but man! I'm beat. "Les Miserables" was the first week or so of August. "Mamma Mia" was about 2 weeks later, then "Shrek: The Musical" last night. Obviously, "Les Miz" was my favorite of the three, but I had fun doing them all.
It is funny how my brain responds to a "should" or "have to". I haven't been listening to my own music pretty much since mid-July. Usually, I listen to musical theatre for fun, but when I am listening for shows - and particularly for several so close together, I get antsy to listen to something else. I think that is what I'm most excited about - musical choice! :)
Anyway, the shows all went well, had their own special challenges. I'm ready for a break.
We interpreted the show tonight and overall, it went pretty well. There were a couple of glitchy moments, translation-wise, but I thought it went very well. The interpreter's light burned out within the first seven minutes of the show, so they had to jury-rig something for the first act. By the second act, they had a new lamp in our usual light and all was well.
The real issue - which always comes up when there is an "add-on" show that isn't filled with regular subscribers - was that *some* of the people didn't really think that their $27 limited view ticket meant that someone/something would actually block their view. This is somewhat ironic because the person who complained the most a) sat in a seat where the only thing the interpreters were blocking were the gigantic black speakers and b) he fell asleep for most of the show.
If I'm being gracious, I would say that sleeping is a natural reaction to listening to beautiful, relaxing music and I hope he had a restful sleep. This happens to me in the symphony, but I don't generally sic the ushers on the conductor for not having more to look at. Mr. Snooze had one of the ushers come and CALL MY TEAM OFF THE PLATFORM DURING THE SHOW to ask us to move. Pardon my shouting, but it was a better option than swearing. Um. We're kinda busy up here, in case you hadn't noticed. I don't really know what people are thinking. Do they actually think that we just jumped up there, started signing and then someone thought, "Hey, let's turn a light on those cool folks who are signing down front!" It doesn't really work that way.
Once this happened, we spent all our extra energy (there wasn't a lot - we were interpreting "Les Miserables", after all - 3 hours, 85 degree day, packed house) trying to figure out when we could move off the platform to accommodate the people in the audience who were sending hate-rays** in our general direction. That's all fine and good until the end of the first act, when I didn't see that the platform was not butted up against the pit wall and my foot went in between. Thank goodness, I didn't do more than a minor twist - it hurt for a minute, but more than anything I just realized that it is really kind of dangerous to be jumping up and down off the platform in the dark while trying to make sure our timing is correct, etc. At intermission, we moved the platform so that my team was standing on it and I was on the floor. It is a compromise for the Deaf audience - we level the heights off - I am as tall as my team when I'm on the floor and she's on the platform. It just felt safer and smarter.
Standing on a wooden platform is easier than standing on the cement floor, in case you were wondering. My feet hurt.
Anyway, I felt good that we tried to be as accommodating as we could while still meeting our obligations as interpreters. I know folks were upset. My advice to any one thinking of buying "limited view" tickets is to ask for a definition. "When you say 'limited view', what do you mean for this show?" They will tell you. Sometimes limited view seats are outstanding and much less expensive for basically the same view as anyone else. Sometimes, you get what you pay for.
**I must include the fact that some of the folks were incredibly gracious and kind. They knew that we were doing our best to give them a better view and at the same time, were aware that even if they were frustrated, we were just doing our jobs.
It is interesting to go from "30 Days of Get Your Art On" to zero tangible art. It wasn't purposeful, but just the nature of rehearsing for a show and having a full time job and other commitments. I managed to waste time in other ways, but I haven't produced any art journal pages or written in my journal or ANYTHING tangible. I'm not upset about it, but it is strange. I feel a little like I forgot to do something and then I realize that it is just that I'm used to getting a little glue on my hands every day.
Tomorrow is the show, so wish me luck or "break a leg" or "break a finger", as it were. I'm excited to interpret and nervous - shows that I love are always a blessing and a curse - blessing to do a show I know and love, but a curse because I'm always extra nervous. It will be a good show - I just want our audience to have a good time and understand the story.
This music still has the power to bring me to tears, to move me beyond words. Tonight was an experience - to see the 25th Anniversary tour show - updated in some ways, changed, clipped, reinvented, and at the same time, triggered in memory. Seeing the show for the first time in 1988 in NYC in the Broadway theatre with Roby, interpreting it the first time, seeing it with my friends and family, seeing the 10th anniversary version, singing it in the car with Roby, seeing the 25th Anniversary concert in the movie theatre. I just felt awash with memories and love for the show.
Moving into a week of prep for "Les Miz". We see the show tomorrow night and I can't wait. I'm a little nervous because I know they have changed some of it. We've already established that I'm resistant to change, so these anxieties should not be surprising to anyone.
It is hard to believe that July is over today. All we have is the rest of the day and then we are on to August. Time goes by so fast sometimes, it amazes me.
This week is "Les Miserables", so I will be rehearsing and seeing the show and then interpreting on Thursday. I'm excited for the new production and nervous at the same time. I always ALWAYS love the show, but they keep cutting little bits away and I miss those little bits when they go. I'm also nervous about the new set and costumes and everything. I remember people saying, "The show is so GREY." I always thought they were crazy. Eventually, I realized that if you only see it one time and you haven't listened to the music since 1985, the show might seem grey. For me, all the color and soul and beauty is in the words, in the voices, in the stories of redemption, friendship, love, sacrifice. I don't need the chandelier from "Phantom" or the color and movement of an action movie. There is something so rich about this particular story for me and I guess since it is part of me, I've been listening to the music my whole adult life, that makes a difference. Anyway, I am anxious to see what the revival brings.
A new Nablopomo starts tomorrow, as well. I've forgotten the topic of the month, but I never really follow those themes anyway. More on that later.
Well, I didn't really pause for a break so much as I paused for rehearsal. I am getting ready to interpret "Les Miserables" in the beginning of August. I didn't get home until after 9:00pm tonight and then I had dinner and watched Masterchef. I thought about doing some art but I just couldn't bring myself to get everything set up, then do the art, then break it all down again.
I am skipping a day and I will not feel bad about it. :)
I love Sundays. It is the designated day that I get to kind of do what I want. I have rehearsal today (really, splitting the script), but other than that, I can do what I'd like and I don't have to feel guilty.
Going to do a little art, watch some "24" and maybe watch my "Les Miserables" concert since it is on PBS tonight.
When I arrived home today, I was struggling to get the key in the lock so that I could run to the restroom (special share, I know) when I spotted a package by the door. It was my brand new copy of the "Les Miserables 25th Anniversary Concert" that I saw in the movie theatre a couple of months ago. I'm SO EXCITED to watch it again. I love that I live in a time when we can have the things we love so close by and easily accessed.
I have always been one of those people who would rather see a known, loved movie than a new movie, so DVDs and videos are perfect for me. I watch movies over and over and over again. I like the comfort of knowing what is coming, that if I fall asleep, I won't have missed anything, that I can watch it again later. Musicals are particularly great for that.
If you want to watch a couple of clips from the concert, you can pop over to the Video Inspiration page. I think I have been pretty good about adding labels so the videos are easy to find.
Other tidbits: I am thinking again about how much the blog has changed. Last year was pretty challenging and there were lots of things I couldn't really bring to this forum. I think I got used to talking about non-essential stuff, but now, sometimes, I feel shy about bringing things up but feeling like I want to do something more. I'm working on getting over it. :)
I bring this up because I am currently taking a writing class and I am *considering* posting pieces from the class here. I haven't decided yet. I barely decided to say something about my writing class - it felt like something I wanted to keep to myself for a little while, but I realized I might want to post some of the pieces, so I decided I would float it out there.
For me a couple of things come to mind in terms of profound joy in ordinary moments:
Watching the "Les Miserables" 25 Year Anniversary Concert
Collaging
Sitting on the deck at the beach listening to the waves, feeling the warmth of the sun on my face and watching for whales
Talking with M.
Conversations with Todd
Dinner party with the old gang
Seeing "The Lion King" and "In the Heights" (I didn't think I would like it)
Listening to music and playing solitaire on the computer ("Conviction of the Heart" and "Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen" come to mind)
If I had to pick ONE, I would pick watching "Les Miserables" on the big screen. I know I keep writing about it, but I think I had some profound moments that evening. It was just such a strong reminder of Roby, of my love of theatre, my passion for the music, that we are all here to love each other and to see the humanity in each other and that's all there really is in life. I can almost bring that feeling back when I close my eyes and remember watching it - heart racing, on the edge of my seat, tears streaming.
Admittedly, I am a little sad that my most precious memory of joy in an ordinary moment is not with another human being. It has not been a year of human contact for me really. There have been notable moments, but really, 2010 was a year about standing on my own two feet and learning to be comfortable in my shoes. I'm not part of a pair, I'm not overshadowed by another stronger person, I'm not hanging out with someone that everyone wonders "What does she see in THEM?". It was mostly just me and my decisions. Me and my foibles. Me and my successes. Me and me. That's all. It is a lonely place, but I think, ultimately, a necessary one.
{Future tool: Tara Mohr’s The Next Steps After Vision… For the next 5 days as you round out your year, we’ll share one tool each day to help you plan your year ahead.
For a visual journey into reflecting + manifesting, check the Flickr images tagged with #reverb10.}
December 24 Prompt – Everything’s OK What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead? (Author: Kate Inglis)
Sitting in the darkened movie theater in an audience filled with passionate, loyal, adoring patrons, watching the O2 25th Anniversary Concert of "Les Miserables", I had that familiar sensation - the one that makes my heart pound and I sit towards the end of my seat and the tears well up. The first song that really struck me was "What Have I Done?" at the beginning of the show. The song is sung by the Jean Valjean (played by Alfie Boe in the O2 Concert). In addition to the beautiful singing voice of the performer, the lyrics of the song moved me to tears.
[VALJEAN]
What have I done?
Sweet Jesus, what have I done?
Become a thief in the night,
Become a dog on the run
And have I fallen so far,
And is the hour so late
That nothing remains but the cry of my hate,
The cries in the dark that nobody hears,
Here where I stand at the turning of the years?
If there's another way to go
I missed it twenty long years ago
My life was a war that could never be won
They gave me a number and murdered Valjean
When they chained me and left me for dead
Just for stealing a mouthful of bread
Yet why did I allow that man
To touch my soul and teach me love?
He treated me like any other
He gave me his trust
He called me brother
My life he claims for God above
Can such things be?
For I had come to hate the world
This world that always hated me
Take an eye for an eye!
Turn your heart into stone!
This is all I have lived for!
This is all I have known!
One word from him and I'd be back
Beneath the lash, upon the rack
Instead he offers me my freedom
I feel my shame inside me like a knife
He told me that I have a soul,
How does he know?
What spirit comes to move my life?
Is there another way to go?
I am reaching, but I fall
And the night is closing in
And I stare into the void
To the whirlpool of my sin
I'll escape now from the world
From the world of Jean Valjean
Jean Valjean is nothing now
Another story must begin!
That night, in the dark, after 25 years of listening to this music, hearing Jean Valjean decide to change his life, change himself, gave me the sense of well-being that comes with knowing everything will be okay. "Yet why did I allow that man to touch my soul and teach me love? He treated me like any other. He gave me his trust, he called me brother. My life he claims for God above, can such things be?...he told me that I have a soul. How does he know?" It was exactly what I needed to hear at exactly the moment I needed to hear it.
This is Colm Wilkinson performing from the 10 Year Anniversary Concert.
There were many moments that night that gave me a sense that I was on the right path, that things would work out. Ultimately, I always go back to the line near the end of the show, "To love another person is to see the face of God." That is what we are here to do - love each other. See the godliness in everyone. All the rest is just a distraction to see if we know what we are supposed to do.
{Future tool: Gwen Bell – How to Create Your Personal Manifesto. For the next 8 days as you round out your year, we’ll share one tool each day to help you plan your year ahead.}
December 22 – Travel How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt)
I traveled quickly in 2010 - lots of last minute trips. I went to the beach, to Las Vegas, to Sacramento, to Chicago. I wanted to go to London for the 25 year "Les Miserables" anniversary, but I think I chickened out. I wanted to go to New York to see a friend, but timing was poor.
For 2011, I hope to get to New York, to Sacramento to see my friends. I want to go to the beach for a week or so, maybe to Dave Walley's again? I think I might want to go on a road trip. Not too far, but maybe somewhere I've never been. Stay in a nice hotel and do some photography experimentation. I'd like to go visit Teesha Moore's art studio in Seattle - maybe a train trip up. I think I might want to go to JournalFest next year, but I'm not sure. Maybe I won't be ready. If I'm not, that's okay, but someday, I will go.
from REVERB 10 (I'm not sure I know what this is...){Future Tool: New Year’s Goal Questions for No-Goals Creatives from Jeffrey Davis. For the next 10 days as you round out your year, we’ll share one tool each day to help you plan your year ahead.}
December 20 – Beyond Avoidance What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?) (Author: Jake Nickell)
I'm sorry...I had to get up off the floor because I was laughing so hard about this post. Maybe I should commence listing the things I DID do, because that list is much, much shorter. Avoidance could be my middle name.
Here is the short list in no special order and without explanation:
better car maintenance
get rid of clutter in my life
buy a new bed
organize my bills and my invoicing system
work on my art journals
work on my Roby stories
stayed in better contact with Shirlee and family
stayed in better contact with friends
insert exercise into each day
read 30 minutes each day
take a class each term to finish my degree
take an art class each term (even if only for one day)
taken the trip to London for the Les Miserables 25th Anniversary (3 shows in 3 days - the O2 Concert, original show at the Queen's theatre and the new version at the Barbican or maybe the other way around) **This is my biggest regret
taken a trip to Sacramento to see my friends more
trip to NYC
Solitary vacation at the beach for a weekend
purge books
purge videos
show more love and appreciation to the people in my life
send Christmas card
actually do the work in "Creative is a Verb"
See...the list is LONG and incomplete. I let myself be distracted and procrastinate. I did do some good things this year, but I didn't do more. :( I'm making plans for 2011, though. Trying to keep it attainable.
Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors). (Author: Ali Edwards)
The first thing I thought of when I read this was a strange moment to choose and I spent some time tonight trying to choose a "better" moment, but I couldn't get it out of my head, so I'm going to go with it.
It was a gloomy, rainy Friday afternoon in February. I left the office early to go to a medical appointment. As I was navigating the freeway, my phone started ringing. Having subscribed to the whole "No talking while driving" thing, I did not answer. Then the AIMs started ringing and a text message from my boss. "Call the conference bridge. NOW." Irritated that I couldn't just have an extra hour off to go to a medical appointment without having to work, I called in.
Within a few minutes, parked in the lot of my doctor's office, I sat, stunned. We were not sure if we would be in business the next month.
I went into the doctor's office. My mind was reeling with what I needed to do, how I was going to talk to my staff. Then, they took my blood pressure. SKY HIGH. Concerned, they asked, "What's going on?" I can't even remember what my BP was but it was terrible. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, I was trembling. I started to cry. I told them I would be fine, and I knew that I would be, but I couldn't stop crying - reaction crying. I kept telling the doctor and nurse that I was fine - I was just sort of in shock.
I ended up having to have an EKG done and got a referral to a specialist. They made it sound like I was going to die right there - they called and got me an appointment for Monday morning. I was in shock - here I was, in this moment where almost the worst possible thing was happening at work and now, a health scare.
I walked out to my car and got in. A sense of calm came over me. I drove back to work to make sure that the folks who were working were okay. I was there for a few hours and then I went home. Over the weekend, it never occurred to me to send food to work or plan a farewell party as I heard some of the other call center managers did. It NEVER, ever struck me that way. I KNEW we would be okay and that the best thing to do was to go business-as-usual.
I guess it took these two moments crashing into each other for me to remember what was really important. My focus changed and I felt a sense of strength and confidence I haven't felt in a long time. It is weird to think that something like this makes you feel alive, but it did. It made me realize that staying that way was THE MOST IMPORTANT THING. More important than work, more important than my fears or perfectionism, more important than anything else and I decided to focus my attention on it. It changed everything for me. I'm not sure if anyone else noticed, but I can still feel it stirring inside me.
The only other moment that came to mind is an entirely different kind of ALIVENESS. The other moment was a moment when I was watching the "25th Anniversary Les Miserables In Concert" at the movies last month. When Jean Valjean sang, "But why did I allow that man to touch my soul and teach me love", I felt this intense love for this show, for Roby, for my life. I can't really explain the joy that this show lifts in me - it is like breathing fresh, clean air or drinking cold, clear water after being parched. My heart swelled in my chest and for the next 2+ hours, I lived in a beautiful, musical place that was so comforting and familiar and yet new again. I loved every minute. It renewed my love of theatre in such an intense way. When I am done interpreting "Hair" at the end of the month, my treat to myself is to start listening to this version on CD.
Now that I have time and a little more energy, I wanted to take some time to focus on the fantastic evening I had on Wednesday at the "Les Miserables" 25th Anniversary Concert movie event. I LOVE Fathom Events - showing Opera, theatre, competitions, art events, anniversary showings of old films - what a fantastic idea! I love that someone thought of this. If people are able to see unfamiliar types of events for affordable prices, they might fall in love with an art genre that they would never have been exposed to otherwise. This goes back to the whole idea of listening to your parents music or to the radio - you hear things you might not choose to listen to but then you might be inspired to explore. With iPods and headphones and backseat DVD players, there has to be another way to expose people to different types of entertainment, different music genres, etc.
The "Les Miserables" concert was beautifully filmed, beautifully staged and had an incredible cast of talented actors and singers. The gentlemen who played Valjean, Javert, Thenardier and Enjolras were BRILLIANT singers. Lea Salonga was very good as Fantine - passionate, beautifully sung. The woman who played Eponine was outstanding. My favorite cast member in this production was the boy who played Gavroche. He was a FIRECRACKER! Charisma poured out of him - he could act, he had great physical presence and he could sing. It made me long for the old "Little People" song from the original version of the show.
Even in concert version, I was moved to tears. Just being immersed in this beautiful show again was such a great experience. I found myself remembering moments in my life when those songs and the show were pivotal - lots of memories of Roby and NYC. It felt like being at a live show. The audience was electrified, too. People clapped and cheered in the movie theatre and seemed very emotionally invested. It felt like a room full of people you know because we all shared one thing - love of this show.
After the curtain call, Cameron McIntosh came out and said a few words along with Alain Boubil and Jean-Michelle Schoenberg (the French composer and Lyricist) and Herbert Kretzmer (English language lyricist). Then they brought out the 1985 Original London cast members. Thankfully, Michael Ball was there (the BEST Marius ever cast in the role and still able to sing the part better than anyone else) and Colm Wilkinson.
The piece de resistance for me was having 4 different Jean Valjeans sing "Bring Him Home" together. They had the current Valjeans from the Barbican and Queen's companies, Colm Wilkinson and the concert Valjean sing together. It is so beautiful.
The Four Valjeans sing "Bring Him Home"
I really only had two complaints:
1. I wish the entire show was still intact - this seemed to have some edits. I am hoping that most of the edits were for the concert and not permanent changes.
2. As I stated in a post a couple of days ago, Nick Jonas was not good. I felt badly for him - he was surrounded by these classical and clearly trained singer and he sounded like he had a clothespin on his nose. His voice is much too thin for the part of Marius. Unfortunately, no one has ever been able to sing the part like Michael Ball could. I always thought it would be impossible for someone to sing Valjean as well as Colm Wilkinson, but I have never heard a bad Valjean. I definitely have my favorites, but I have never heard it sung badly - even in the high school production I interpreted. Marius - that's a whole other story. From the original Broadway Marius (forever captured on the OBC recording and on the 1987 Tony Awards show performance) on down to this guy, the Marius' have been thin voiced and unconvincing. Shame, really, since he has some powerful music to sing.
Here is Michael Ball singing "Empty Chairs at Empty Tables" from the 10th Anniversary concert:
Anyway, all in all, it was the highlight of my week. Actually, it was the highlight of the Fall for me, I think. I am hoping, hoping, hoping that this will be sold on DVD like the "RENT" Broadway closing DVD and all the other "Les Miserables" videos. I can't wait to have it in my hot little hands!
Please understand that I mean this in the kindest way possible.
If an event starts at 7:30pm and you are with any more than 2 people and you show up at 7:29pm, please do not expect patrons who showed up ahead of time to accommodate you. Please do not ask me to skooch over or tell me your sad story of woe about how you want to sit together. I made arrangements to be there early with my people. You can do it, too. If you choose not to, please accept the consequences gracefully and quietly. Come in, find a seat, separate or together and sit down.
If you show up late alone, there might be seats. Please go to one and sit in it. If you show up late with a group, please assess the situation and then make a quick determination - either sit in the front where there are groups of available seats or sit separately. Do not wander to and fro in front of the screen talking about how full it is and are those 3 seats together in the back taken. The event has started.
That is all.
Thank you.
Jean
P.S. Nick Jonas should not have been given the role of Marius. 'Nuff said.
I twisted my knee on Thursday somehow - I probably stood on the platform strangely at some point or twisted getting down in the dark. Who knows? But it HURTS. I have been putting emu oil on it and taking MSM capsules to get the swelling to go down. You don't really realize how much your knee does for you until you are limping up and down stairs just to go to the bathroom.
I didn't sleep well last night, so I took a long-ish nap this afternoon. I feel all fidgety - I wanted to go to the movies today but I slept through prime movie-going times and decided to just wait. Now I have "Buffy" on - starting my favorite season- Season 6. This is the one with the musical episode, one of my favorites.
I am hoping to do some art journal work but something is blocking me - I'm pretty sure it is my own expectations. It's annoying. So, I'm just going to take the plunge and DO SOMETHING. I think getting started will help me get back on track. I have lots of projects and things I want to do, so I hope I can jump start myself.
I have my tickets to the "Les Miserables 25th Anniversary Concert" on November 17. I CAN'T WAIT!!! What a thrill!! I hope that more Broadway type events come through in these special events. It's a great way to expose people to Broadway shows without spending $55-$120 for a single ticket.
