Squirmy Questions

What am I doing with my life?
What do I need to do differently? What is working?
Who do I need in my life? (or out of my life?)
Where do I see myself in 5 years? 10 years?
What are my personal goals? professional?
How can I achieve my goals? Start in chewable bits.

One of the things I decided to do was to take a class of some kind this fall. I think I'm going to start with something I want to take, as opposed to an academic class, but I am definitely working my way there. I found a bunch of classes I'm interested in taking. I just have to sit down with my calendar and figure out what might work. The whole "Shrek" thing being a different month might actually work in my favor - this way, if the class starts in September after the show, I don't have to miss anything in October. A plus, for sure.

I'm kind of excited. Just to do something new, something different. Meet some people, it's a good thing.

The Truth?

I feel lost today. I have been feeling that way for a little while now and I can't shake it. It will be okay - I just have to work through it. It is probably one of those "every ten years" things you have to go through.  Just feeling like a stranger in a strange land most of the time. Thinking about stuff - decisions, choices, blocks, courage.

I think it is the heat and the lack of sleep that hit me today. It was really humid overnight and I had the first "can't sleep" nights of the summer. I felt lucky on the one hand that I have only had one night like that and it is nearing the end of August. Most summers, I feel pretty sleep deprived.  I need some decompression time.  One of my friends on Facebook from my telecourse a couple of years ago went on a 5 Day Silent retreat - and not the American Sign Language kind. Totally silent. I love the idea of that. I'm thinking I might create one for myself. Intriguing thought.

Walking the Fence

Some of my Facebook rules have sort of bled over here and I'm not sure how I feel about it or what I'm going to do about it.

My Facebook account is an odd mix of work folks (peers, bosses and clients), former students, potential employers, personal friends, interpreter friends, etc. Once the students and work folks started friending me, I realized that my Facebook was about something other than my own pithy status updates. I choose not to participate in political conversation, controversial conversation, religious conversation, I don't "repost" updates from folks supporting cancer or AIDS or battered women or marathons or anything else. I stay fairly neutral because it seems prudent.

Sometimes, I am tempted to write about issues that I am thinking about - political, social, etc. but I haven't really done that here, either. I can't decide if I want to bring most of that to the blog and I can't really say why. Maybe I'm just afraid to expose myself so publicly. Maybe I just don't want to. Maybe it is just safer that way. No one is offended. No harm, no foul.

I was just thinking about that today as I listened to a discussion about eggs with salmonella today. It made me wonder if the folks who drop by ever wonder why the hell I only talk about goofy stuff or personal stuff without context. I don't write the blog for other people - I write it for myself and other people stop by. But still. I'm not sure I'm ready for prime-time blogging. I'm gonna think on it some more.