Thursday, September 22, 2011

KITB: What Do You Dream?

From Kick in the Blog:  We live our lives day in and day out and all of us harbor some dream or other. Whether we believe that dream will ever be realized is neither here nor there.

What's your dream? Is it for you? For your kids? Can it come true?Do you even really want it to?

The way I dream changed the day Roby told me he had AIDS.  In those terrifying hours, a new way of thinking took over for me and I still feel the effects of that day, that event.  We stopped thinking about our future in terms of decades and years and started living in the now.  I think I mostly do that still and there are definitely pros and cons.

When I turned 30, I realized that I had no idea what I was going to do with the rest of my life - I had never imagined being 30 because I had always known that Roby would not be around by the time I got there.  I realized that I had to figure out what the hell I was going to do and get to it.  

Now, I dream and do.  I still have dreams of writing, so I write. I take workshops and keep the blog and write emails at work. Maybe that will be enough - maybe someday, I will write something more.  I dream of being art-ful, so I am actively finding ways to incorporate art in my life. I had given up on art when I was young and it is so fulfilling to find it now. I will never make a living being an artist but that isn't the dream for me - my dream is living a colorful life, playing in exploration of words and colors and images in the world. I am doing that and I'm so happy to be doing it.

I would still love to live a summer at the beach, maybe a whole year. I think this one is a long way off for me, but not impossible. I'm not in a hurry at this point, so that's okay.

Right now, my most immediate dream is to take a vacation - a real, live relaxing vacation.  It is coming. I'm planning it now. :) 

Kickintheblog.com is the brainchild of Jessica Rosenberg ~ It's my life...
Come back often for new prompts to kick you out of your blogging rut! 

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