Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Day Five: Life's Purpose

"Life is just a chance to grow a soul." ~A. Powell Davies

I didn't take a lunch today. I meant to. I did. So I asked myself my questions on my drive home (not the same as focusing completely on the question, I know): "Am I becoming a person I respect? What are my successes? Where can I still grow?"


Today, all day, I had a sense that the "work" I was doing in the world was not what was important. That helped me focus on the part that felt important - the people. I felt like I took time with the people I spoke with today and tried to really focus in on them. I had a few interruptions and a few moments where I let myself get distracted from full engagement, but I stayed alert to them and tried to limit them and excuse myself when I couldn't. This is still an area of focus for me, but hopefully, the people I interacted with today could feel my attention and the genuine regard I had for them. I was trying really hard to put that out there.

One area of growth that I am working on is accepting compliments. I realized today that not only is it respectful to myself to accept a compliment, it is respectful to the person giving it. I got an email from a supervisor today thanking me for my leadership and congratulating me on a job well done. My first instinct was to deny that I had anything to do with it. Ultimately, I split the difference. I thanked them for the compliment and gave kudos to the other people who helped me earn it. It felt respectful to include the people involved, as long as I acknowledged the original intention of the compliment.

This soul-growing is hard work. I'm exhausted from paying so much attention. Isn't that funny?

2 comments:

  1. Yeah for you that you didn't skip your exercise simply because it didn't happen at lunch ... you were flexible! and that's a compliment!!

    I have really worked on teaching my children that what matters in life is people and our relationship with them. I don't want them to refrain from a behavior because they fear they will get punished but because they know it will damage their relationship. For instance, my 9 yos is in a phase of name calling. I could punish him and drive the behavior away and underneath but that doesn't help him deal with his frustration in a healthier way and it doesn't help him realize that name calling hurts his relationship with his brothers.

    What we accomplish doesn't matter as much as how we accomplish, I think

    ReplyDelete
  2. Graciously accepting a compliment is something I initially had to work hard to do. Now, I own it. That's not to say that I always expect compliments. On the contrary.

    I heard someone explain gift giving this way (and a compliment is a form of gift, is it not?):

    It feels really good to give a gift, doesn't it? But in order for there to be a giver, there has to be someone willing to receive. If I won't receive the gift that's offered to me, I deny the giver the joy inherent in giving. I end up taking from that person.

    Puts things in a different perspective, doesn't it?

    ReplyDelete

LinkWithin

Blog Widget by LinkWithin